would a doctor dare ask this question to......

my poor auntie whose business was greatly affected when her market stall underwent upgrading. she was forced to re-locate not once but twice. by the time, she was back to her original stall in the upgraded market with increased rental in beo cresent, most of her saving was exhausted. she had used almost all for the shifting and refurbishing for the temporary stalls she was forced to shift to.

to aggravate her business being a small time neighbourhood market grocery stall, NTUC set up shop just next to the upgraded market. her business had dwindled even worst. in the end, she was forced to return the stall to HDB. her trouble was far from over. very soon, she fell victim to dementia and could recognise only a few familiar faces.

initially, i was lucky she could still remember me. then later, she was quite blank....and now suddenly she fainted and was admitted to the hospital.

this morning, cousin choon drove my mum, my auntie ah kim (choon's mum) and me to SGH to visit my sick auntie.

visitors to hospitals now had to undergo stringent registration. they couldn't freely visit their invalid loved ones like the last time. H1N1 (bird-flu) could be one of the reasaons why the hospital was taking no chance in preventing the spreading of such new sickness which was quite contagious and fatal.

after recording our ID's particulars and having our hands stamped, we were allowed access into the wards after placing a sticker on our shirts.

there, i saw auntie laying motionless with tubing feed and ventilator over her nose. she was still unconscious since admittance. soon there was a young doctor who came to brief us about auntie's dreadful critical condition.

just before he began, auntie's youngest son and a grand-daughter, ah choo arrived. auntie didn't have her own children. her youngest son was adopted since he was a baby. ah choo belonged to her adoptive daughter.

the doctor began his briefing about my poor auntie's situation to us. he explained that auntie got a big void within her cerebellum which was filled with fluid. beside being afflicted with dementia senilis, she could be having a stroke before she fainted. whichever the case, her health was in a very sorry state. her pulse was irregular which could have a high chance to incur a cardiac arrest.

the doctor turned solemn and requested her immediate family members to endorse instruction whether to save her or to let her die peacefully. he stated the complication that should we prefer saving her, she might not wake up and remain permanently in a vegetative state. saving her in an emergency cardiac arrest would mean applying CPR which could fracture her ribs given her small and fragile frame.

my mum and ah choo, auntie's grand daughter were closed to tears. mum was very close to this elder sister of her. i was also holding back my tears. i just felt very sad for auntie who was such a good, generous and kindly soul in her healthier and happier times.

her good-for-nothing husband deserted her for china where he died there. she adopted 3 children: 2 boys and a girl and she toiled very hard to upbring them.

during her good old days when her business was very good, every chinese new year she would distribute cans of abalone, mushrooms and other canned food to all her siblings. mum used to get 2 cans of NEW MOON abalone among other goodies every year.

now she laid motionless and unconcious on the bed.....her bank saving practically zero.

the doctor told us that he needed an endorsement from us within the next 4 hours or so whether to save her or let her go peacefully should there be a life threatening emergency. neither mum, me or anyone else could decide. so we left it to auntie's own adoptive daughter for the final say.

meanwhile, i was asking myself this: "would a doctor attending someone's like mrs lee kwan yew dare ask the same life and death question?"

this is uniquely singapore! same situational patient but with different kind of anticipation.

personally, i would agree to let auntie go peacefully cos she has indeed toiled too strenously for her entire life. it's about time she would enjoy eternal peace and rest. she was 80.

auntie, i shall miss you....i shall miss your joviality, your cheerfulness, your kindness, your generosity but most of all i admire you for your courage and dexterity in overcoming all odds. you may have zero cent saving after toiling all this years and in such dire state now but to me dear auntie, you have already conquered all!

bless you auntie and peace be with you.....