BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN OF SINKIELAND

a few days ago, out of my msn popped a guy - a down and out tourist guide.
we chatted. i realised the poor man was out of job for more than 6 mths cos his tour agency went bust. and he wasn't paid for his last salary or got any compensation.
Longsu as he was called was a malay muslim. he sent me his pic. he didn't look anything malay...more like jap or chinese. definitely not malay.
he was a very very handsome chiohunk. solid bod. sexy kind of beady japanese kinky eyes. and my god! get this - spoke in mandarin very very fluently and wrote very ariticulated mandarin...
NOW I M VERY INTERESTED IN THIS LONGSU...the down and out tour guide...haahaa....;9)
so i asked him finally how he survived since he was married and with 2 schooling kids some more...he said...haizz very sad and pek chek...and asked me whether i could go out and meet him.
he really needed some one to talk to. OK LOR!...me retired what...plenty of spare time. so off i went to meet him at my queenstown mrt station at about 5 pm.
what ethical guide he was!! chun chun 5pm on the dot, he was there already at the station. from the escalator, i could already sixth sensed him...and true enough, i went straight to the phone and there LONGSU was in macho dark sunglasses....
"LONGSU?!!" u called out the moment i saw a chiohunk stylo milo attired tall solid bod hunk there.
he turned. smiled. removed his shades. my goodness!! one solid handsome hunk man!!. he gave me a very firm handshake. and no..this time no tickling of any other little fingers. a gentleman he was.
i already liked him...heehee...;9)
so we headed to the queenstown library as i promised over the phone i would teach him a thing or two in share market investment. the library had internet service. i also needed to check my end of the day shares transaction.
it was a real hot day. we were sweating like hell!...no problem. anticipated there. from the plastic bag i was carrying, i pulled out a cool POKKA peach tea for him.
he was so surprised!....how cum i knew he needed a drink...haahaa...so i told me...me a 6th senses piggy...;9). of course i got one for myself - a OOLONG POKKA TEA...now u know why i damn blur..and "OOLONG"....;9)
finally we reached the library. logged onto the terminal....and he edged so close to me that i could feel his...er..body heat among other senstive organ poking at my side of my ribs.....
to be cont'd.......

PART 2

After about 15 mins, he was still pressing on me....pretending to be interested. i knew he wasn't listening or paying attending. his juices was at his poker rod on my ribs......;9(
"er...longsu...u dun mind...my ribs like going to be chewed up by ur solid bloodhound...." i hinted to him rather bashfully.
he got my messaged...and bloodhound REVERTed pup status....phew!...
"....so u understand already, long?" i asked.
"dunno lah...bob...forget it lah....me no money to invest too...." he replied rather dejectedly.
"u could make some money for urself...and u dun ve to be mercy to anyone's will u know...LONG?" i encouraged him, "and now my broker firm got promotion. i introduce u in...u get shopping vouchers, me get too...and u dun have to pay a security deposit...me one of their favourite client...been in the market since i was sec 2...."
still, he gave me that dejected expression. ok lor! forget about the whole matter...we started talking about his past tours guiding...
so interesting the places he went....most of the muslim tourist attraction countries like TURKEY, XIN JIANG, MECCA, ...SO ON...
wow!!....wow!! wow!! and the different men especially those really "handsome" ones from TURKEY, he had flings with.....haahaa...;9)
BUT WAIT!!...AREN'T HE MARRIED??!! yes! precisely what i asked him....and this is his story......
...to be cont'd...
bought tickets oledi or not??...bo sen li u know....:(

PART 3

why am i writing in so many colors? cos his stories are so so colourful....here we go...
he married his wife out of convenience and pressure from his family....he told me although he was considered as macholy manly..he was a pure BOTTOM....meaning he loved to be laid.....;9)
oh gosh!! i m really learning alot of words and things and dunno what XXX from the queer world...how interesting!
er...but pls...me still pure as the shiniest moon...the most fragrant lotus from the stinky mud pool it stands out from....;9)...cos me going to be a monk wannabe when the destiny comes.....
he gave his wife 2 very beautiful kids. his wife was chinese. and her undying love for him, she willingly converted to be muslim giving up most food that i would die for...PORK!...char siew, lup cheong, bak pao, bak kut teh, pork chop...etc...'cuse me...drooling now....
so there we have it - a seemingly nice little cosy functional family. father, mother, children....happily doing their own little activities.
and father..my god...is an underground teetukong!
i was asking him how he survived when he was out of work. he said his wife brought in the bacon...but then how?...what about himself ?...how he passed the time??
here he bo pian. and the darkest secret came out....
he got a couple of " boy friends".....HUH??? BFS OF A MARRIED MAN??...and yes his bfs also married men with family...but not local.
he was especially fond of his jap bf....so one fine day, he went to his jap's condo. they er...u know...did those things...
after that the jap gave him money and left for work. to return the kindness, he house clean the jap. did his laundries, cleaned up his place, mopped the floor..etc....
cleared his wardrobe...and at one dim corner...a sparkle was flashing at him....a very bright sparkled....blinking...blinking...blinking......
to be cont'd

YES...IT WAS A BLING BLING!!
what's that u asked?
A ONE CARAT DIAMOND as big as my monster pimple! it was a loose stone.
he picked it up. stared hard at it. kept it and wait for jap bf to return from work which was going to be pretty soon as it was like almost 6pm +....
DING DONG! that must be jap at the door.
daintily he hopped to open it. once the door closed behind them, the loving smooches started......*smacks....smacks...kissess..kissess...sucks..sucks..*....and yucks..and yucks to me!!!
the jap was hot. he was hot. and they kissed. they embraced each other. all hands and legs were so busily entwined with each other.
they were liked doing the sensual samba and pirouetted all the way to the bedroom. by then, a trail of trousers, shirts, tie...and undies were strewn from the hall all the way to the bedroom....and the humping, the moaning, the groaning and wrestling match began...and oomphs..and arrghs...and wooo..and ahhhs...and YES...YES..YES!!
and all silence......
both of the lovers just laid on the bed...still in tight embrace.
LONG then open the small cabinet at his side of the bed. took out a tissue paper. wrapped it. walah!....a sparkling diamond!
the jap's eyes suddenly became very enlarged from a slit...
"where u got that?" jap asked.
"while cleaning ur wardrobe.." long replied.
"wow, it's a $13k belgium diamond A grade i bought for my gf when she was here...and shit!!...she lost it in the wardrobe!!" jap was a bit worked up. he din know his jap gf actually lost his diamond....he was furious. then he smiled. see how dramatic japs can be....;9)
CHOTTO MATTE...CHOTTO MATTE!!! (means WAIT!)
DID WE JUST HEAR THAT JAPS HAVE A YIPPINESE GF????
oh my god!!...i could not stop munching on my satays that i just ordered....my eyes almost popping out as i learnt of this....what a tale to behold!!!..........
to be cont'd.....

PART 4

NOW my hands were very busy. it was such horny exhilarating bedroom stories...one hand was hold a satay and the other hand shakily holding a cup of teh c siew dai....(cream tea with less sugar...hawker language)
i was staring at him....he was eating casually his ornitoufo...i mean his tofu goreng...and me was like mouth agape with the beef satay frozen in mid air....haahaa...;9)
gulped, munched and down the frozed satay...gulped, downed my teh c...and i asked, "BUT U MALAY...AND A MUSLIM MALAY???!!!.....can like that so WILD meh??"
LONG turned solemned. artistically placed down his fork and spoon. mopped his mouth with tissue, looked at me with almost guilty beady jap liked eyes and said," BOB....haizz...i married my present chinese wife out of convenience..." he began.
"my parents pressurised me to get married....I NEVER LIKE WOMEN....(oh my god!).....I LOVE MEN...(oh my goodness!!)....and was already having secret underground flings with my jap bf for many years till now without my wifey knowledge....(oh god save the wifey queen!)..."
"but my wife loves me so much, she even converted herself to MUSLIM.....and we have 2 kids already...in primary school..."
my mouth was wide opened....my eyes were even wider....my jaws nearly dropped!
"er..so how cum u interested in me?" finally i had to ask this very very question i wanted to ask but never dare to ask....
"you??...u cute lah, bob!!" he laughed. "i saw ur face only...i feel so comfortable...and today i was so so pek chek cos my pay with the busted tour agency down the drain lah...not a single cents i could get....and i saw u on net...and asked u out lor...and THANK ALLAH!!...I DID....talking to u made me so much better...thanks bob...u r such an ABANG!....."
now me blushed...haahaa....;9)
u bet we ended up as ABANG & ADEK...the real ones...not those bedfellows A & A, ok...dun think deviated about me...
after our last stick of satays, i walked LONG to the mrt station and we parted. i consoled him and told him not to worry.....every tunnel has a light....and every storm comes a bright shiny day....and take care...and bye bye to him....
me never do that...never done it....only very good at fantasysing it...and using my er...bo liao lame creative writing skills presented it to u all...
u bet LONG will meet me again...and now i fear for his well being...WHAT IF ONE DAY HIS DEEPEST SECRET IS EXPOSED TO HIS WIFEY, WHAT CATASTROPHE WILL FOLLOW???
now i beginning to worry for him....for his wifey..and most - for his 2 kids.......how long can such secret last?....forever?...until the day he dies..and this brokeback underground altered ego life buries with him???
i wonder....and i worry.....ORNITOUFO TO U, LONGSU!!....U REALLY NEED A BIG ORNITOUFO......
the end.
how is it? comment.