MORPHING BUSH

THE ACTUAL SUFFERING OF LEETAHSAR.....

J says:i think asia market is leading by itself
Bob says:cos i got business report from hk>>>china an hk..economy going to soar man...jin!!!
Bob says:yes..china now is damn hot..and most hk..shares are linked to china...
J says:soon they will realise dow is gone
Bob says:the bloody usa cos of the stupid bush..keeep bombing here and there instead of sprucing up their econmy will ruin many things..
Bob says:unprodcutive the stupid bush..BIG IDIOT!!!
J says:yeah lor
Bob says:jin...my lau mah..now giving me headache
Bob says:exactly like lauhan..who has left hyaadai
Bob says:she bang down my cacti dish garden..and still can radio me for 2 days laio...
Bob says:damn suffering
J says:move out
Bob says:haizzz...how i wish..sell the house..ea goes separate no friciton liao..
Bob says:my mum is really like a broken down radio...always want to win an argument even she is in the wrong..
Bob says:i specifically told her not to touch my dish garden which took me a long time to create as i was meeting a reader...
Bob says:woould be back soon...and she backside itchy went to touch and mess it up..
Bob says:and some more instead i radio her...she started stereo me...
Bob says:like that also can???
Bob says:last sunday...a couple offer to send me home...from my gardening class...
Bob says:the moment they entered my house...my radio mum told them not to trust my words...can u imagine how embarrassed i was..i was the lecturer of the class..and she said like...ME HER SON OR NOT HUH???Bob says:luckily...that was already the last lesson..so bo chap!!!
Bob says:and my couple students jus laughed..cos i like got 6th senses..already told them what me mum was going to say...to them...
Bob says:so i was laughing..and they were laughing...
Bob says:and my mum...tot she was damn clever...we were laughing how foolish she was!!!
Bob says:sabo own son like that....sad jin...very sad....
Bob says:i always laughing...but actually...this is what's happening to me daily...
Bob says:and today..she got the guts to repeat...she told me..i make her can't sleep for 2 nights..and she vomited...and diarhoea...
Bob says:something wrong or not..jin...
Bob says:v...n d..is food poison ...guan wo pi si!!!
J says:ahhahaha
J says:old already
Bob says:so i yell back at her...and told her..if she so clever to radio...USE IT ON HER OWN HUSBAND..and that shuddup her!!!
J says:a little crazy
J says:yeah la
J says:actually why she so scare of old man
J says:i still dun get it
Bob says: damn damn sian..jian...this stupid foolish family of mine...damn damn sian...
Bob says:does ur mum embarrass u infront of people..stranger.s....??Bob says:i tell u another incident..
J says:no la
J says:we dun la
Bob says:she booked tour to genting...purposely dun book hankoo's
Bob says:so only me and she...and the bloody hankoo create a storm...
Bob says:wanna burn down hourse..wanna sell house...all the stupid nonsens.
Bob says:on the way to genting...i was engross in magazine at the stop at ayer hitam...then .i realise..i ran up the bus...the moment she saw me...
Bob says:she radio infront of everyone...screwing me like hell...ya...i was wrong so i kept quite....she wah lau...get louder and louder...until the rest of aunties...got to criticise her
Bob says:telling her...they never do like this to their sons....their sons..sure scold them back...but me...so good keep in silence...
Bob says:and that shut her off....
Bob says:she think she great..but actually present herself as a very stupid woman!!!
Bob says:sad...jin...very sad...
Bob says:i always tell her...5 organs in her face...she uses her radio mouth the most...
Bob says:after speaking that....true enough..radio breaks down...and the more u try to shut her off...the louder it gets....I SURRENDER MAN!!! Bob says:so recently there is a chinese newspaper contest...WHAT DO U THINK UR MUM IS LIKE...name an appliance...and in less than 35 words, write the reason...u know what i write...there's a prize of 1k for the best and funniest caption..
J says:calm down
Bob says:i wrote...my mum is like a phua radio....the more u try to turn it off...the louder it gets...
Bob says:i tot...old man gone...can have peace...but NO...this fat lady..is also giving me hell...
Bob says:now u know why i wanna be monk...
Bob says:to search for the reason of my existence......
Bob says:i always say u r very lucky...
Bob says:u understand why now...
Bob says:and at my age...i should be able to decide thing for myself...
Bob says:they are still like controlling me...what a fuck!!!
Bob says:sad....jin...very sad....
Jsays:dun worry
J says:you can come stay with me once i have a house
Bob says:I M PUTTING THIS UP...to let people know what's suffering..is like...

THE GOOD DOCTOR, THE CLOWN AND THE BITCHY JINX

19XX, a 23 yr old goon was in training as a male missy.

VENUE: SINGAPORE GENERAL HOSPITAL, NURSES TRAINING SCHOOL....

one fine day during lunch....it was exceptionally noisy...and many were like talking in tongues...no they din talk...they wagged instead...rumours were flying fast and furious...
THE GOOD DOCTOR OF THE CLOWN was dead....slump in her office...HEART ATTACK...DEAD!!! stiff cold....
rumours had it that the good doctor was tormented by her evil mum in law...the clown's super powderful old bitch...notoriously known as gecko, the shrivelled up lizard.
why? well, she produced a mouse...a white albino and subnormal autustic son. and she had to shoulder the blame...her manufacturing machinery was at fault. the evil gecko blamed her...she forgot his clown son might have defective raw materials..i.e his pinky sperms...
so it went on...day in and day out....day out; day in...day in;day out...oops..sorry..radio spoilt!!!...;9(
u know...as a male missy already damn stressed...as a chiobu good doctor lagi more stressful...and day in, day out, she returned home to face the bigger radio of the lizard...CAN SIAO, RIGHT?
so the good chiobu doc was miserably depressed...and days built into weeks..and then years...HOW MUCH CAN ONE TAKE?..day in...day out...day out..day in...oops...radio...konging off again..HOLD ON....*SLAM..SLAM..SLAM!!!*
ok...let's continue......
so one fine...so happen this gong gong goon went to be a male missy...then one fine day, it happened..THE GOOD DOCTOR WAS FOUND - DEAD!!!
it was rumoured that she couldn't take it anymore...she injected herself with a heart stimulant...like those given to heart attack patient...to stimulate the heart into beating...if ur heart is beating...it does the reverse...IT STOPS IT FROM BEATING!!!...
and she was dead...cold stiff....*sniff*...such a nice ladylike chiobu...most nurses loved...SHE'S DEAD...THE GOOD DOC WAS DEAD...!!! ....sniff..sniff...wah..ahh..ah..ah..aaahh!!!.....:(
WHY?...WHY?...why good people die like that??....even i din know her personally i couldn't help shedding my niagra falls for her...wah..aahh...ah...ah...:(
all were hushed up...just simply reported..GOOD DOC DIED OF HEART ATTACK...case closed!
..............part 2....THE BITCHY JINX...

THE GOOD DOCTOR, THE CLOWN AND THE BITCHY JINX

19XX, a 23 yr old goon was in training as a male missy.

VENUE: SINGAPORE GENERAL HOSPITAL, NURSES TRAINING SCHOOL....

one fine day during lunch....it was exceptionally noisy...and many were like talking in tongues...no they din talk...they wagged instead...rumours were flying fast and furious...
THE GOOD DOCTOR OF THE CLOWN was dead....slump in her office...HEART ATTACK...DEAD!!! stiff cold....
rumours had it that the good doctor was tormented by her evil mum in law...the clown's super powderful old bitch...notoriously known as gecko, the shrivelled up lizard.
why? well, she produced a mouse...a white albino and subnormal autustic son. and she had to shoulder the blame...her manufacturing machinery was at fault. the evil gecko blamed her...she forgot his clown son might have defective raw materials..i.e his pinky sperms...
so it went on...day in and day out....day out; day in...day in;day out...oops..sorry..radio spoilt!!!...;9(
u know...as a male missy already damn stressed...as a chiobu good doctor lagi more stressful...and day in, day out, she returned home to face the bigger radio of the lizard...CAN SIAO, RIGHT?
so the good chiobu doc was miserably depressed...and days built into weeks..and then years...HOW MUCH CAN ONE TAKE?..day in...day out...day out..day in...oops...radio...konging off again..HOLD ON....*SLAM..SLAM..SLAM!!!*
ok...let's continue......
so one fine...so happen this gong gong goon went to be a male missy...then one fine day, it happened..THE GOOD DOCTOR WAS FOUND - DEAD!!!
it was rumoured that she couldn't take it anymore...she injected herself with a heart stimulant...like those given to heart attack patient...to stimulate the heart into beating...if ur heart is beating...it does the reverse...IT STOPS IT FROM BEATING!!!...
and she was dead...cold stiff....*sniff*...such a nice ladylike chiobu...most nurses loved...SHE'S DEAD...THE GOOD DOC WAS DEAD...!!! ....sniff..sniff...wah..ahh..ah..ah..aaahh!!!.....:(
WHY?...WHY?...why good people die like that??....even i din know her personally i couldn't help shedding my niagra falls for her...wah..aahh...ah...ah...:(
all were hushed up...just simply reported..GOOD DOC DIED OF HEART ATTACK...case closed!
..............part 2....THE BITCHY JINX...

PART 2....THE BITCHY JINX...

ALL WAS QUIET in the famiLEE....GLOOM AND DOOM....;9)
pinky was really sad...they said he din walk like a guniang before...u know like a SUPERMODEL with the kar chng kiao kiao....pointy backside. he was normal. walked like a man. talked like a man.
after the anguish of his chiobu good doc wife's death, things changed...DRASTICALLY!!
he sashays instead of walk like man...and drools when he talks...OH MY GOD!! AND HIS FAVORITE COLOR NOW IS ...of all the colors....PINK!!!!!..broom...brrrrm...rrrmmm...THUNDER AND LIGHTNIGING !!!!
he was then like taken the post of DEFENCE MINITOOT....and always sashaying about in the MND or MINISTRY OF NATIONAL DEFENCE.....or simply...MAN OF NO DEEDS....
the bitch appeared...the jinx...she was bitchy. he sashayed...she lagi more sashayed..and their butts bumped into each other...or rather her pussy hammerd his bloodhound...and the whole MND was like...THE HILLS ARE ABLAZED.....WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC......
so they wedded...and the clown now lovingly called pinkie was laid!!...humped!...bonked!!...RAPED!! by the bitchy jinx!!!!
and soon...wahh..ahh..ah...the jinx bombed KK hospital...and next year...she bombed again...and next year...yes she bombed again ...and next...year...*one second pls...*SLAM...SLAM...SLAM!!!*...sorli radio spoiled again....;9)
no lah...she like the world war only bombed twice....so in the end pinkie clown got 4 kids...and the ah lau toa lau kwuee(big embarrassment)...cos then he was the pm and promoting...STOP AT TWO campaign vehemently...and ruthlessly...
he told peasants to stop at 2...GET THEMSELVES STERILISED...u know get their balls tied into knots...and could only fire blank shots.....if not faced the music!!! those who so stupidly heeded the threat are now regretting... FOR LIFE!!
he single handedly enunch almost all the married couples especially most men here in sinkietown....that's why now most are balless to vote them out! ...and now..our population goes into negative brith rate....MATI..AND REGRETTING NOW!!!!........;9(
how how...?...how to enforce this STOP AT 2...when his own clown prince produced twice the amount...4???
so he added a law..newly wedded couple can only bomb KK hospital twice...bombed more than that...sorli.....u were no more subsidised...and ur 3rd child was going to be nationally ostracised....placement in school...last...and only if got vacancy...no free medical follow up care for 3rd child...no income tax rebate...no nothing...better u sell ur 3rd child away...or strangle it ..like u know a nip in the bud to alleviate the parents' burdens in bring up an ostracised innocent child!!!..........;9(
AND NOW HE REGRETTED....COS MINUS BIRTH RATE NOW....ALL THE LAU HANS..WAITING TO DIE...DTHAN SEE..NOT ENOUGH PRODUCTION OF SERFS TO SUPPLY TO MNCS..OR SERVE IN ARMY...SO FT OR FOREIGN TALENTS IMPORT LOR...and the nation sinks further underwater..and hence...SINKIETOWN....;9(
and that my dear readers was our story...THE GOOD DOCTOR, THE CLOWN AND THE BITCHY JINX.....

THE REBELLIOUS LING OF THE LEE

....and our story continues....with the ling of the lee....the only head shrinker daughter of the famiLEE.....
how do i start?.....
oh yes, u can say she's the odd one out....not only in sex..but in look and in blain...WEIRD PUSSY..if u ask me....;9)
of all the people, she got horny and turned on by a bengali....a indian from SRI LANKAN...
the lau eh got so pissed off, he almost hit the coffin planks one time...heart attack!!...and from there on he wasn't in good health..
after the heart block, came the anal block. he got piles. so off he went to the top hospital to have his arse chrome and the piles pulled out...and the whole hospital was like on its toe...all the big docs, small docs, blurred docs...practically everyone was in confusion and trying to pick an arsehair from the almighty lau eh backside...
this male missy was also there...u know what i heard. they got the chioest of the chiobu nurse to shave him naked down south...gel him properly...and poke in a tube opener to prise open his hole so that the top notch arsepicker doc could reach into to pluck out his cherry piles...haahaa....;9)
was told that the rebellious ling of the lee was then like thrown into cold storage...totally estranged from the monarchy...
but as they said good things dun last long...TRUE ENOUGH!!...the mixed colored wedding was not a blessed one...it passed through much strains and ostracisation from her own dynasty...
and pretty soon, the young mixed couple couldn't bear the pressure anymore...especially for the bengali indian. he called it quit! divorced ling of the lee and returned to SRI LANKAN...
lau eh was estactic knowing his beloved daughter was ditched...ling didn't know it was the hand of the monarchy at work...and hence prematurely ended an otherwise quite a beautiful mixed marriage....
good thing she didn't manufacture any mixed pariah offspring...if not she would surely be given the royal white silk to hang herself with..
lau eh welcomed her back wholeheartedly. he proved to the world for he alone could control anyone's fate and destiny...so dun mess with me...like a strong warning to the terrified peasants....
so once back, his ling now became a bit of a ding a ling....she lost faith in man...black ones especially. she cut her hair by herself...and made herself looked like a butch...an AB normal butch...more like a siao char bo...
so siao as she might be...lau eh..bo bian..put her in IMH..no...no..not as a patient but as the top HEAD SHRINKER...so there she stays up till now...TOP HEAD SHRINKER OF IMH....
another weird story from the famiLEE......
er...want some more???