THE DAY I HANTAM MY LAU HAN KOO...

i was furious yesterday. very very furious....

in the beginning, lau han koo - my devlish old man - threw away many years of guitar books collections......songs suitable with guitar accompaniment with plucking patterns....popular and melodious songs that can be plucked by the guitar....very very nice soothing songs....all thrown away by the bloody lau han koo without asking me.....just threw every books that i had paintstakingly collected since i was in secondary school.

this i already tolerated him. i was weeping and my heart really aches from my uncalled for losses.....

yesterday he repeated his nasty action. he threw away my RICHARD MARX CASSETTES...my very favorite songs by richard....RIGHT HERE WAITING, I WILL BE UR MAN.....etc...hell! i was very very furious with the bloody lau han koo.

i questioned him sternly and fiercefully. he intimidated back and challenged me to a fight. he removed his specs and lung at me, throwing a right and a left. i blocked off. before he could give another right, i returned him with a swift and strong right hook across his cheek. he retaliated. i blocked and showered him with another few more blows hitting him face, belly and everywhere.....he grimmaced in pain and rush to the kitchen.

i was left wondering what the hell he was doing for quite sometime i was left alone in my room......out of curiousty, i went to the kitchen to see what was he up too.

oh my god! han koo was searching in his toolbox. to my horror, i saw him found a big spanner. immediately i pounced on him holding his right hand with the threatening spanner.

just then, my monster maid came in and screamed for mamalee. she was here in a flash. she helped me to held han koo's hand and pushed me aside. my maid pulled me away to my next hdb unit and pleaded me to refrain from clashing again with han koo.

by then bloody lau han koo was really a bloodied lan han koo. his nostrils was bleeding from my socking. my arms was dripped with his blood too.....it was really very sad this happened cos yesterday mamalee just prepared the chinese new year re-union dinner with tonnes of food on the table....

when all the siblings came in advance because of our fight to pacify helplessly with lau han koo. of course to no avail........and most lost their appetitie. what a pity! the whole day trouble of mamalee went to waste.

that wasn't the end.....all the siblings was advising lau han koo to wake up from all his nonsense. and the very funny part was nobody sympathised with him even though he was bleeding profusely from the nose. they sided me and that drove han koo even madder. he threatened to call the police.

the lot of my siblings challenged him to saying it was he was started the fight...and poor me was just defending myself even though i wasn't even scratched...pai seh....:(

gradually the bleeding stopped. he cooled down for the time being.....and the bunch dismissed and returned homes.....all for the time being was peaceful and quietened...at least for the time being....

this morning, i woke and mamalee looked liked a panda with darken eyes. she revealed to me almost in tears that yesterday at around 3 am in the morning, han koo went to harrass by kiching and banging her bedroom door. he slept in another room...mamalee said she was very scared and if she had a phone with her, she would have called the police....this bloody lau han koo....still hasn't learn a thing...still as irritating as ever...

next time, he won't be speaking to me any more. he would be talking to me fists......;9(....very sad....so close to chinese new year and on reunion night....he couldn't even cease to give the family hell......:(
From: aussiebiz 16:45
To: leetahsar 941 of 945

83628.941 in reply to 83628.940

tahsar brother, sorry to learnt about the ugly episode you had with lauhankoo. I thot after your last post about getting all the his favourite food, it appeared to me dat you and him had finally make peace. No matter what, I know it is easier said than done, do not lay your hands on him. You will be on the losing end if you do. I won't want to deliberate on this, but trust me this will be the result if you hit him. CNY is just few days away and I do pray you will have peace with him.

From: leetahsar 17:14
To: aussiebiz 942 of 945

83628.942 in reply to 83628.941

thx aussieb. no one sympathises with him when i hantam him. all of them sided me...and he wanted me to hand him the flat lease so that he can transfer into his name...my mum told him even if i accede to him, she would object vehemently.

now mamalee decided to divorce him....only after his wound and blue black healed just to save me the complication just in case. i told her the earlier she decides to leave him, the better....if not there is no end to all our headaches.....

it's either divorce and each goes our separate ways or he dies cock standing....the latter is more likely to happen.

LATEST NEW: He got another new spider spirit called my god! CHWEE HONG....bless u my dear father....bless u! :9S
From: tsr111 17:23
To: leetahsar 943 of 945

83628.943 in reply to 83628.940

I'm on-line now, giving my views on some issues of our state. Read u'r msg on what happened. got my attention. just wondering, what is lau han koo and mamalee is u'r mother?

I thought u said before on some earlier post, that u are living alone as u are old, but have rented out a room to a tenant who was taking advantage of u'r kindness? But now u state there is a lau han koo and a mamalee and even a maid living with u. full house.

p.s. sorry if I am intruding.

MY REPLY:
thx for ur interests.

i ve 2 adjoining flats. one in my name; the other lau han koo.

and this incident happened means i ve fail miserably in the test set by the bloody lau han koo...i hit him real bad. he's now nursing a blue black eye and a sore nose.

and the whole shit had to happen on our CNY REUNION dinner night.

the sisters had asked him to stay and enjoy himself in haaydai. they would send him the monthly and increased allowance saying that there were so much peace and happiness when he isn't around....

and mamalee is hopefully decided on divorce proceeding against him...but knowing my softie mum....she would sure change her mnd in the last minute...and for me...what to do? bear lor and continue to tolerate and see if i could pass the next step....which i think i may just leave my fists do the talking with the very unreasonable lau han! chui guo chui guo to me....

From: postnew 18-Jan 11:57
To: leetahsar 836 of 945

83628.836 in reply to 83628.833

goto Genting , play jackpot, go to Macau also jackpot, why u always waste money on jackpots ? Wake up your idea and don't waste your 15k on jackpots.

my reply to him:
au contrarie. those who "play" are the HOPELESS one.....u dun forget: i got a very fleas infested bloodhound lau han koo as my old man...so all these nonsense, i know better than anyone......

and why u think young supposingly healthy sinkie chap after the "playing" suffers from the lusty seed he sowed....he ends up dead from AIDS!...and who else suffer along with him....the wifey...if lucky she won't be infected. if sway, then it's also game over for her...then what about his children...his parents...his friends...and all those maybe mei mei spider spirits he gunned down with his infected AIDS sperm missiles...they will definitely get infected...and the evil just spreads wider......

and dear boy....that's ur effect for ur "playing"....only the weak minds play. the strong one enjoys the scenery, the human warm there, the food, the culture......etc...all the good things that we can't find at home. if not, why travel so far? to play and get AIDS, is it? so foolish...

now u know the meaning why i said people choose suffering over blissfulness....they get aids, they have themselve to blame....not the chickens who gave him the aids....not his friends who brought him to the chickens...it's he himself....

if a cow doesn't drink the water, no one can force him to..... chui guo chui guo......

cos hor...in a casino, jackpot is the cheapest to gamble...normally i win. in genting, i chose the cheapest 2c jackpot....and hell! cos it was so cheap...u forget that it's still money....i won in the first place like MR300...but u know it was still so early and what r u suppose to do in genting? u gamble...and me played safe...and thought i was damn clever...went for the cheapest 2c jackpot...and kept hoping to hit the 15 free rolls game....and shit! before u knew it....MR500 down the drain....

they have removed KENO...if not, normally i win just by buying $1 ticket...i already won a couple of rounds 2nd prize...came so close to the jackpot of 35k...but in the end, i got a few 3.5k .....11#s...and i got all 10. a few times already...if not a few hundreds were also very easy for me...me a blessed lucky goon...

now apply this to our future IRS. how many non gamblers like me are going to be unwittingly crushed pain pain? me lucky....i still got my por lor mi wisdom intact....the others whose mind are like candle flickering in the wind....the wind gets too strong only, mati....they die with it....how many families going to be ruined....ALL THANKS TO THE EVIL SEED BEING NOW SOWN BY THIS CLUELESS garment of us...the paps are hopelessly detached and denied from the suffering of sinkies....they only care for their own pockets...u die, ur business! that sadly look more like their motto now...sad. ;9(

From: postnew 18-Jan 15:38
To: leetahsar 868 of 945

83628.868 in reply to 83628.860

after u really become a monk, will u still call your father 'lau han koon ' ?

From: leetahsar 18-Jan 16:07
To: postnew 872 of 945

83628.872 in reply to 83628.868

when the day comes that i become a monk...he's no longer my father...cos i would have detached myself and adhere fully to buddhism...he would be another a sentient being hopefully i could enlighten...if not alive...then maybe in death ....in hell...i will meet and enlighten him there to bring forth his buddha nature within...so that he won't have to suffer anymore or causes others around him to suffer along with him....chui guo chui guo....

I AM A GOLDEN VIRGIN
guys, guys....me a pure mint form golden virgin...give me another 10yrs....i shall definitely turn into a diamond virge....

not easy hor....the temptations...the mei meis...the hunks aiming at...my god!....i dunno why.

ladies fall in luv so easily with me...aunties especially..and even little girls...and young girls...i once went to teach in a sec school...and instead of listening and observing my hands on practical in gardening...there was this very pretty teenage girl...u know what? she was secretly sketching me and when the lesson over...she passed me the drawing....and wrote inside...MY FAVOURITE ECA SIR....goodness! so touching...er...cannot say i wish i could give her a kiss!..sure kena one u know...hahahaha...

there was a time i was engaged to teach a bunch of very rich kids....more like spoilt brats...but the whole bunch in my hand...melted like butter...all very attentive when i taught. and the good thing was i was paid $200/ day with damn good makan and drinks provided. this was actually a week holiday science camp initiated by the ex-mp seet ai mei...shiok man! the fun of teaching those kids...and bringing them to places...all transport provided...expensive places u know like the zoo, the birdpark, sentosa seaworld...and the free entrance one too like botanic gardens and bt timah hills - both my territories...very very interesting.

and hell! guys too also fall in love with me....i was accosted several times when i swim....and of course i was flattered and told those male spider spirits...of all thing...- i am a "monk" in training...and they respected me for that....so er...ok hor ended up as friends...i mean...gays are also people what....me no prejudice..... friends only hor...mutual respect platonic pals.....ornitoufo...
i dunno how to explain...but this mei meis, spider spirits...and even the male version, they are attracted to me....i am like a magnet u know...i also dunno what they see in me...i m just a stupid cute cute chubby specky goon....maybe of my electric gazing eyes...in my horticultural training....the girls always would like to speak to me....they even called themselves my "lst wife", 2nd wife and a 3rd wife....and even a ahneh guy also so interested in me ...and also addressed me as "darling"....i mean ok lor...me also a joker what...so i darling him back....hahaha...

maybe people never expects me to react what they anticipated....and that make them the more to want to get closer to me.....so u see, it's my goonie character. my easy going fashion....i can just talk to anyone be it rich or poor....healthy or sick...so easily...maybe that's my gift....the gift to sense their inner feelings.

even my bloody lau han koo...i sense his suffering within too. i like to help him...but the only way that can make him happy is to give money to him...then he can go havoc longer...

and pai seh....today i strike lottery again...yes pai seh again. 2nd prize 3959 chun chun. 2B...and got 2k. my lau han koo knew about it and my goodness! today he treated me like some respected big shot...so so courteous to me....i know, i know. he was hoping i give him some commission....but u know what...i gave him a dressing down.

instead i went buy grocery and bought all his favorite expensive food...salmon, steak, lamb chop, sausages...etc...he loves meat. so i think this way better then give him the dough and off he goes firing his sperms missiles in haaydai spider spirits again...i m unwittingly prolonging his life...and *sigh* extending my mamalee's suffering....chui guo chui guo

HOW I MAINTAIN MY VIRGINITY

there were so many chances i could ve lost it. when i was in MACAU, i was accosted by damn chio mei mei spider spirits who came bothering when i was winning so many coins in the jackpot machine. "ge ge, u lonely? me got room upstair.....can come up to play with me?" the mei mei s.s would start.

i was in a jackpot winning streak, of course, i told her sorry...go play herself. after she left, hell! it was sway(unlucky) ka par cheng....lost every damn dime!

then again while i was in holland. i went to look at those "goldfish bowl" within housed a very sexy whore doing all the very sensual enticing movements.

if u r interested, u bang at the door. she opens and both of u negotiate the price. if right, then u entered and the curtain will be drawn and then u start ur humping.

the most sinful i did there was went for the peep-show. almost bought ticket for the live floor show. but hell! the ticket was freaking expensive. so i stuck to my peephole show and kept dropping in coins to continue watching the live performance but only through a peephole.

and then in the holland hotel - HOTEL IBIS - i still remembered when the clock hit 11pm, there would be blue films on the tv. no joke! the whole night, blue flims after blue flims.....i watched until i fell asleep.

very fun my HOLLAND trip. some more it was partially sponsored by a local nursery who sent me there as their representative. and the attention showered on me by the plants suppliers was really amazing....maybe i write this as one of my story....I LOVE HOLLLAND....

then again, my next trip to hk. one of my very teeko hkie pal....no no not my best hk pal...another one....me got plenty there...the whole MONGKOK POLICE CLUB police ....most of them know me......i stayed there a couple of times and each time it was like almost a month with my best hk pal's family whose wife was the chief chai por there or the boss policewoman...they had a very large living quarter with 4 bedrooms...so 1 was a guest room specially reserved for me.....so pai seh.

ok...this bloody gutless teeko hk pal brought me to MACAU again. and hell! he brought me to a GOLDFISH BOWL. There u get to view all the naked ladies carrying a number outside a glass enclosure. all this mei meis would sit and pose sexily smiling, waving and sending flying kisses at u....

my god! the rate was really cheap...i dunno that was what the hk teeko told me and asked me wanna try...so i told him - a married man - "u go n try, i go outside and wander around...at certain time i come here to meet u again. dun worry, i won't tell ur very fierce wife or ur mum about it..." his mum loved me....why? cos this joker when he was sent over here for horticultural training after my best hk pal, nearly died. i saved his life.....this would be another very interesting story.....THE DAY I SAVED A HONGKIE'S LIFE.....i was a male missy in training before i seconded into plants training....so basic first aid is sap sap water to me.....

so whenever i was in hk, his mum would belanja me big time....it was also the first time i ever tried mini abalone....i told my best hk pal about the mini abalone...he damn wicked and laughed...."ya...next time ask her to belanja her personal MINI ABALONE to u...hahahaha!" damn bad this fella!

and now i just realise my depressed and deprived hunk male pal who always asks me to accompany him to trips to remote islands.....suddenly it dawns onto me....hell! this married joker might be aiming at my blackhole most of the time....why only he calls me...and not anybody else...not even his wifey....why hah? and my last trip with him nearly broke my shiny moon and my virgin curse....hahahaha....

and my more recent one was to TAIWAN in last march. ooh! JUST LOVE TAIWAN.....the food, the friendly people and best...the way i spoke hokkien and the way they reciprocrated in their slang taiwanese hokkien...very shiok u know!

my fondest memories was the warm human touch at HUA HUA FLOWER HOTEL....the ah pek there so friendly and helpful. this blur sotong asked him how to get to XIMENTING...and he gleefully guided me through like 3 alleys. he also reminded me to carry an umbrella which he volutarily took from the hotel to lend it to me. it was drizzling ...and then walked me to almost reaching the place...then i thanked him. he smiled and happily walked all the way back to the hotel.....so touching. can we get this sort of warm service here in sinkietown? NO WAY MAN!

i luv to visit TAIWAN again...but this time to look for my taiwanese bunch of good buddies....lost all their contacts...shit! i intend to stay longer......i just got my 15k prize money which is still warm in my pocket...:) and among them is this very horny guy.....very interesting...but very teeko....he rubs girls...and he always rubs me too from the behind...very irritating...but very funny chap....all his blain juices are at his dickhead. his mind is an air head.

......there are many many more....i love to travel. and normally i do it alone. very troublesome if i had company cos my action is very impromptu and very fast one....no dilly dally business. on the word GO - I BUZZ OFF!

would u all love to hear my zany travelogue tales?....buy tickets hor.....