PART 3- THE HOUSE WARMING PARTY OF ACE

Very soon, ace held his house warming party. i was invited too. i told him me very poor...nothing to give him only recycled gifts i collected over the years which were not even used after unwrapping.
he said it was ok. he only appreciated my presence. aaaah...! i found a good gift to give to him..a retro 30 yrs no more in production optic bedside lamp with built in analog clock....
that's it!...this would be a perfect gift.
PPPPP...PP!....sibeikang's was downstair horning his trademark horn again. off i went.
sbk: what u got there , bob?
lts: oh..a retro bedside optic lamp.
sbk: is it?..i like...can see?...(opened wrapper for him to peek)...wow...i like...can i exchange my red wine with u...i m bringing 2 bottles...u take one bottle and i give the other bottle...but i get to keep this lamp....hehehehe....
sbk...u bloody idiot!!....really lived up to ur kangIng name!
of course, i said NO! not long we reached his condo which was near by the sea....
we parked into the basement carpark. when i entered the basement door to the lift landing, i was pleasantly shocked. wow!!...so much food!!
sbk: bob, stop it!!...this one not belong to ace. his is on the ground floor club house.
shit! wasted man!
ground floor. lift doors opened into the club house. oh my god! pathetic!!....only got 6 miserly food warmers with equally miserly quantity of cheapo food!
and we were the earliest batch to arrive. sbk spared no time to dig in. he was very hungry.....he piled up his food. after that went for second round. me ...i was very pai seh. i anticipated it definitely won't be enough with the arrival of the FOSC gang.
i ate very little....
later, ace's relatives and colleagues came. his colleagues for ur info were monstrous sizes both male and female...and they attacked the food going for numerous rounds.
by then, there wasn't much left. the FOSC gang still haven't appeared. the caterer came and requested to remove all the utensil back. so ace instructed his maid to bring tupperwares and brought back what little scraps were left.
after it was done, the FOSC came. now the table was totally bare! what to do?....all lan lan but still gotta pass presents to ace. i can tell u...everyone of those jokers was famished cos most of them just finished work and hadn't taken their dinner.
what a disappointment to them!....came with expensive wines...and nothing to eat!
after a brief gathering and look around at his posh penthouse which overlooked the sea...nice view...bare rooftop ...no plants nothing...simple cheapo interior decor...we requested to buzz off.
why?...cos everyone's tummy was grumbling...HUNGRY LAH!!...
so we left. the first thing was we complained ...cursed and swore!
the next the whole bunch headed for the nearest hawker centre and supped...cursing and swearing!......
so rich...and so cheapo....why huh?
end of this lame story.....;9(

PART 2

PART 2

how lian ACE was a very fortunate guy. his parents were rich. bought him a penthouse. gave him a sportscar to zip around. really a sportscar could only sit 2 person - he and his whoever gf he picked up.
TING..TING..TONG ...TONG....my msn beeped!
was surprised!...of all the unknown msn-ers i got, there was a dialogue box and asked me to click ACCEPT. ok lor! ACCEPT, i clicked.
next moment, DA LIAN MEI was online msning me. she told she was thankful that i talked to her in crisp mandarin. or else the previous nite dinner would really be very boring and awkard for her since she catch no balls what the hell were the gang of FOSC was talking about....hahahaha....;9)
kaypoh me started asking her how long ace had been her 'bf'. she was taken aback. i was even taken further aback after i heard her revelation....
dlm: he's not my bf...please lah....just a friend i know in singapore...
lts: huh?...then why he said he brought u here all the way from da lian?
dlm: is it? i dunno...i been working here many years..in IT in charge of da lian business representing a sgp firm here...
lts: oic...so u intend to marry to him?
dlm: pls lah...i m just his friend ...NOT ..gf...
.....scenery changed.
not long after the msn with da lian mei, ace msned me. wow!...very busy leh. ok lor, entertained him. he kept asking about shares ...how to invest and all those lame questioning.
a very impatient bastard! u slow to respond he nudged u TING TING TONG TONG...for an immediate answer.
everytime he does a a few times of the nudging, my pc hanged!...and i was locked into my shares trading site. means i had to re-boot my system to log in again...SUPER IRRITANT!
finally he told me he wanted to get an engagement ring for his da lian mei. now this was getting confusing...cos i just msned her and she claimed he wasn't even his bf. so how?
dun bother lor. recommended him the cute cute girl of a little sweet jewellery shop in FUNAN CENTRE. ok tot he would go. so i called the cute girl and told her a pal of me coming to buy a pair of engagement rings at about 8pm.
she closed shop at 8pm. so in order to do a bit more business, she promised to open and wait for ace.
my phone rang and hanged up abruptly. it was ace. i tot he called the wrong number so i dun bother to reply.
but no this rang and hanged was something totally blown my mind off.
the phone rang and the cute girl called: 'uncle, u pal coming or not huh?...i very hungry...gotta to go back to see my sick baby son u know....'
lts: huh? tot he went there already at about 8pm. he din come meh? ok...u wait i called him and see how.
it was like 8.30pm. she had waited for half an hour. i called ace. and this was what the bastard said to me!
ace: i called u just now n hanged up. expected u to call me...u din
lts:...huh?...what u mean?...why u called and then hanged up?
me really blur leh. why like that?
ace: oh...cos my incoming call is free...so i dun want to waste my airtime...u should ve called me...u din..i went to another jewellery shop and bought the rings already....thanks anyway..*click*
huh??...like that also can this fucking bastard!!
so i was so embarrassed and called the cute girl to close shop. i had to bluff her he last minute got something on. the girl sounded disappointed but what to do....was it my fault???
.....to be cont'd.....

A SILLY BOY AND HIS TEETU

it's been a long time since my teetu stories continue.
it's was abruptly stopped after i got so many flaming. there are definitely many teetujias, teetukongs, teetulauhankus, teetulauhuays and even one desperately lovelorn teetukia that are hovering all over me...
WOE IS ME!...
anyway, today story is about a boy who proudly called himself ACE. the only ACE i knew is ULTRAMAN ACE from the ULTRAFORCE.
well, this ace here was definitely no ace.
i met him in one of my FOSC meeting or FULL OF SHITS CLUB.
the gang of the boys came with their local gfs. this ace came with a teetujia from DALIAN. gosh! this ttj was beautiful. slender, very fair skinned, rosy complexion and just like me big lucid gazing eyes....i liked!...hehehehe....;9)
so after intro us to his gf, we settled down and ordered our food. sibeikang, wifey and the rest of the club member guys were there too.
after makan, time to foot the bill. of course, this how lian ace dug out his notes to pay. after that settled, it was among the FOSC members to pay him. go dutch what...what u expect? ace really foot the bill or what?
he paid first, he got a kick. the cheena mei mei who came to collect the money tot he was so rich and generous. shiok, right?
we ordered drinks and started talking cocks and shits. ace intro his gf and told us in hokkien he conned her all the way here from da lian....as if...;9(
every of the boys started to take a different perspective look at that pretty cheena ttj. they looked at her in the eyes of lust and discreet....;9((.
if u said u love ur gf - no matter where or what nationality she's from - would u want to lead people to look at her in such manner?
of course, not. but for ace, talking in this manner kinda made him shiok cos it gave him a false feel good that he was the charming type that so faraway mei mei would gladly just followed him back here.
after some exchanges of particulars, we dispersed. the da lian mei, let's called da lian mei lor hardly spoke anything cos we were talking in singlish, hokkien and rojak kind of dialects. she was totally blurred!
to be cont'd......