Terrible Pickup Lines

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"

Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."


Man: "Haven't we met before?"

Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the Venereal Disease Clinic."



Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"

Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."


Man: "Is this seat empty?"

Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."


Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"

Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"


Man: "Your place or mine?"

Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."



Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"

Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."

Woman: "That's in the phone book too."



Man: "What sign were you born under?"

Woman: "No Parking."



Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"

Woman: "Do Not Enter."



Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"

Woman: "Unfertilized!"



Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason."

Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"



Man: "I can tell that you want me."

Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."



Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"

Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species."



Man: "May I see you pretty soon?"

Woman: "Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?"



Man: "Your hair color is fabulous."

Woman: "Thank you. It's in aisle three at the corner drug store."



Man: "Your body is like a temple."

Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."


Man: "I'd go through anything for you."

Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."



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