leetahsar: [ AFFINITY MAKES A MAN AND A WOMAN A COUPLE....SO TREASURE IT.....IF AS FATE DICTATES IT SHOULD END....THEN END IT GRACEFULLY.... ]

Movies, Sports, Games, Hobbies - Brokeback Mountain
From: PWEESNG 11:25
To: leetahsar 17 of 18

92409.17 in reply to 92409.16

i think there is one very important thing that we missed about the show....

IN many places, Gays are thought ot be very unfaithful and they swap partners around, amongst their peer group...

What the show showed us is that there are faithful gays around. With ledger keeping the shirt and thinking of his partner and all....

the show is not so much a discussion about gay and why they ought to be eliminated. But rather how one has a inner self to be truthful too and how they live their live, what kind of prejudice they face in the world and how because of this prejudice, they cannot live a normal live like us.

my 2 cents worth






how one has a inner self to be truthful too and how they live their live,

i unwittingly and dunno how...cleverly written the above quote while the second one was someone replying to my GAYS AND STRAIGHTS posting....one of the more meaningful i read the whole entire gloomy morning...:9)

THE GAYS AND STRAIGHTS....again

once awhile such topics would pop again and all the self-righteous would start to condemn all the gays....u know one long pole and by a big swing, all gays die pain pain...

how narrow minded can all the jokers here get? so i bei tahan and did my goonie preaching.....

the problem here is not about gays or straights. it's about us. our perception. we set standards thinking that this is right; that's wrong base on relativity.

example what is the number 1 refers to if there's not a 2....and how a 2 comes by if there's not a 3...so a 1<2<3

if there's no numbers then where do 1, 2, 3.....9 refers to.

similarly if there are not such thing as straights or straights are the minority....then which is to be the appropriate standard the society base on? the gays?

humans are so self glorifying. they set standards to everything....my son is cleverer than ur son. my father is richer than urs....and jinx my wife is more macho than lily neo....etc....

if there's no reference, then all this artificial set standards won't even exist....

the whole thing is in a very simple context that we fail to see...

#1 all are humans...and each his preferred taste. if u like chicken, u eat more of chicken....if u dun like beef, then dun take....is there anything wrong if i were to be a full vegetarian? does that make me weird and queer?

#2 it's all in our mind....our mind tricks our heart to treat our 'uncommon' brothers and sisters differently. that is why we start to mock and ostracise. we feel good by making them feel inferior and bad...and do we really are the better or worst breed?

crows would help their own injured one should any outsiders try to cause more harm to their fallen "brother".

why can't we humans be the same?

in everyone of us - gays or straights - we flow the same colored blood....how many times must i repeat before the people hear will understand?

COMPASSION AND A MINDFUL HEART....brothers and sisters.....ornitfoufo....

THE FINAL CHAPTER OF SIBEIKANG & CHINJIAGONG ..... well, at least for the time being....

Today being a boring monday, sibeikang called me and asked me to accompany him to his mattresses delivery again. over the phone, he said it was only a few snappy ones, won't take more than 3 hrs. good! cos weather was really bright and sunny and i wanna to swim....and see if i could pick up ck briefs again.

but hell! once on board his pirate ship - his lorry, i noticed one whole stack of orders...oh shit! i had been conned again! what to do? u boarded a pirate ship with a damn "kang" captain crooked, u were like deadmeat.

off we went for his round cruising the whole sinkieland. sbk was thankful that i obliged him cos he had a hell of things he wanted to share with me.

"Sar, what u tell to chinjiagong, huh?" a puzzled sbk started to query. " she like a changed woman leh....no more checking my handphone....no more arguing with me over who just called me...and all those bo liao irritating matters......what did u do u her? tell me leh...i am damn curious...."

"nothing what..." i teased him. " why u still longing for teetujia to lay u or feast on ur horny bloodhound is it?"

"quick lah, sar...." he pestered, " tell me leh...then i tell u something else about cjg.."

oh! a "business" transaction....i tell u this; u tell me that. ok lor! i told him, " No lah, i told ur wifey what a chiohunk u r...a very desirable one...u look like REGGIE REN, the taiwanese heart-throb, so it would be her losses if she takes the gamble to chiong with u, right?" sbk was orgasmic with my comment and was laughing and smiling. then i continued, " it's not his fault if he's charismatic or dashing, right? all the girls and spiders spirits and teetujia ...all will fall for him...and they are waiting for u to be history before they would suck him dry...so if u keep behaving like what u r now...i bet u r going to lose sbk for good...then blame urself, hor..."

"wah lau! tahsar, i din know u so damn bloody good compare to our marriage counsellor...should ve saved the money and come to u instead man!" sbk was so grateful to me. "K, now my part to tell u also why she suddenly change so be so kwai kwai and congenial...."

and the reason was cjg was getting desperate for an answer. she kept thinking she was in the right. so she copied sbk's birthdate, time, and chinese name and brought it to a very reputable fortuneteller...and he told her exactly the same thing i had just told sbk...except he added that all these marital woes began with her...she was the cause of all the problems. that shut her up for now...and boy! she got to fork out an amount for pay for those words....so serve her right! and now she was convinced the fault lied in her...and she kwai kwai already and shuddup liao lor....hahahaha....;9) ornitoufo for this two kids' bo bliao squabblings...already parents and stil behave like 2 spoilt brats!

until the next big quarrel again....i await for my next free lobster thermidor and steak...surf n turf free meal....:9)

the end?

TODAY MY LAUHANKOO AW KAR LIAO WITH ME....

Yes striked lottery again!!!

this morning hankoo went to the dentist. when he returned...aiyoh! so touching!....he bought me breakfast - my favourite some more - veggie mee hoon.

i was like eating and teary....so so touching! ok..ok...lah!

since saturday i kena 4D again...pai seh lst prize again..2795...cos the other day was with sibeikang cruising to deliver his mattresses. i kept seeing 79...59..79...59...

SO since two of us in the lorry...i hantam lor 2795....u see 7 and 5 sharing the 9...with 2 of us...so 2795...

i gave money to han koo...and now his turn to move to tears....hahahaha....;9)

hope this can continue....

and the teekee kei75 interrupted:
Pls lah Uncle Bob, the key word here is "respect". If u give us some, we will return some (more) to u.

On the other hand, I have made a private agreement with this "kopitiam". I will now take step to reduce my territories across Sammyboy forum. Let the others have a chance to dog eat dog. Otherwise, they have no sinlee to do.

This morning I actually wanted to drop an entry here on "Kindness doesn't pay". I'm glad that I dun have to do that need now. It should be, "It doesn't pay to be kind!"

so i replied him:
my dear kei75...i do respect u...i even treat u as my pal....but u know hor...all the xxx pic is turning my pizza shop into a peekaboo shop leh...and hor...i keep replying to u and sun wu kong postnew...i forgot what story i wanted to write in the first place....

at first i do enjoy and laugh until tummy pain....but again too much means now i get tummy cramps instead....

MODERATION LAH....

i never despise u or postnew...both of u r good helpers...but maybe a bit over zealous....and if unwittingly hurt both of ur feelings...i apologise...cos i din know if u din point out to me...thanks for telling me my unmindfulness...sorry....

so we are brothers gang right? if so pls go serve customers...if not siao liao....bo sen li!!....... ;9)

PS:

TRUE KINDNESS DOESN'T REQUIRE PAYMENT....IF THERE'S TO BE A PAYMENT TO KINDNESS...THEN IT'S NO MORE KINDNESS.......IT'S A BUSINESS TRANSACTION....
......a golden humble advice from this goon....ornitoufo....

yes i kena again...5 nbrs out of 6....not much.

Winning Numbers
2 3 7 13 31 33

Additional Number
4

Winning Shares
Prize Group
Share Amount (each) No. of Winning Shares
Group 1 No Winner No Winner
Group 2 $45,047 8
Group 3 $937 385
Group 4 $260 1,387
Group 5 $30 17,469
Group 6 $20 22,896

Group 1 Prize was not won.

my nbrs i ve: 2, 3, 5, 7, 13, 32, 33......only $900+

but last sunday i got 2795....lst prize again....$2000...so this morning i gave $50 to my old man...now i think for the time being, all is calm at home....but i ve a very queer and unforthcoming sensing....not good....;9(......especially on my lauhankoo father....i can't help having this queer inner apprehension...something bad approaching pretty soon....

anyway, taking all my total winning for this month...MY BIRTHDAY MONTH...no joke....i think close to 10K.....:9)

thank you heaven...and all the buddhas for ur uncalled for presents to this goon...thank you very very much....;9)

oh my god! i just realised how close i was to getting the 2nd prize of 40k+.....no joke...next...definitely a next time...

SQUABBLINGS BETWEEN TWO BOYS: KEI75 AND KNIGHTRYDER

out of nowhere, knightryder zoomed in and told me about kei75's nonsense. of course this teekwee chwee emmmh see kei75 won't stayed put to let knight slanged him. and he retaliated and informed me about knight's past posting and hantaming at him...

and finally i got to reply to this 2 boyish jokers:

From: leetahsar 27-Feb 11:27
To: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 1247 of 1270

83628.1247 in reply to 83628.1246

and KnyghtRyder

ER...PAI SEH....how cum i got embroiled with these 2 little boys' squabbling? ...and dunno over what...his enggerish...and his engrish?

i dunno leh..i ledi dunno...

anyway, won't it be easier if u 2 guys just handshake, hug...and er...maybe kiss each other and be pals? (u can be my #3 diciple sar cheng...want?)

it's just forum posting, how cum people get so sentimental and romantic and then all work up and then work out?....i mean the BANNED part.....????u see my qn marks worms are growing and multiplying more and more ????.....??????...???

anyway, he is my chu bajie now...he may be bad to the rest...but i think i will take him as my "protector" diciple...and the other sun wu kong aka postnew is back in hua guo san jacking all his gf chiomonkeys.....hahaha..;9)

i bet after this posting, he should be back to hantam me pain pain....hahahaha...;9)

and then postnew posted more XXX pics and kept calling me a pig...so i bei tahan i replied to him:

this pic looks like a diy self assembled chair with a back rest...and ur next posting to me is blank - NO PICS leh...meaning my protection sutra is very effective...now u r going to get shrinking headache for being naughty to sifu...standy...OMANI PADME HOM...coming ur way...;9)...this rogue diciple of me....

ask u to do business....and u start continuing ur monkey business.....

十 個 春 帶 不 夠 暴！！

10 balls also not enough to explode...(from anger courtesy from these 2 rogues diciples)

an encouraging word from brother aussieb:
From: aussiebiz 26-Feb 08:50
To: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 1232 of 1270

83628.1232 in reply to 83628.1231

>>>...Bob Lee say: sie liao, bo sinlee!...<<<

Can you please tell the Pizza boss be patient can or not. He got so many supporters and regulars here where got bo sinlee one. Still too early lah. Maybe some of his regulars go for bak kut teh liow.

and kei75(jixiaolan) starts his power chinese poems again....

I have tried to stir up controversy in the hope of boosting yr biz but still bo sinlee. Sie liao...

怪我没有他用心

我以为我的付出你懂 却出现裂缝
用一夜去守候 可能失去你的认真的心
是否有我
以为我的付出 你懂
却出现裂缝
到谷底才肯说
留下惊慌的我
没有机会重头

做者- 容易被伤害人的纪晓岚

and i just had to borrow his chinese text to reply him....so proud of myself for being so cleber (clever).....
From: leetahsar 27-Feb 10:14
To: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 1240 of 1270

83628.1240 in reply to 83628.1239

做者- 容易被伤害人的纪晓岚

u 被伤害? or u 伤害人, 纪晓岚?

wah so cleber i! jus c n p ur words, dun even have to open my cstar2006...;9)

and he replied wtih another poem - dunno whether original or he pirated it:

Original

感情中专心的人容易被伤害

I'm Just A Fool Lost In The Sea Of Love.

我以为我的付出你懂 爱却出现裂缝
怪我没有他温柔
用一夜去守候 可能失去的你 认真的心是否有用
我以为我的付出你懂 爱却出现裂缝
情到谷底才肯说
留下惊慌的我 没有机会重头

and my reply:
From: leetahsar 27-Feb 10:54
To: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 1242 of 1270

83628.1242 in reply to 83628.1241

oh my god! HAVE U FALLEN IN LOVE WITH ME???

comments from aussieb...the faithful follower of the squabbling couple...sbk & cjg.....
From: aussiebiz 02:14
To: leetahsar 1229 of 1238

>>>...suppose to go out again with sibeikang and wifey..and the gang of godsons...but i think better skip...every nite out until 2am...3 am...i seow man! (go crazzy like that)....tmr have to go temple do charity works....go now and i will be deadbeat tmr...how to work...<<<

From reading your story of sbk and cjg, I think their relationship is not simple. To start with both of them do not have the mutual trust required for a succesful couple. Then on one side (sbk) is the 'chiong' type while cjg is the over possessive type. Sbk I am sure knows cjg's character and should be extremely discreet when going about his 'other' activities. Cjg on the other hand should at least 'kwa pua' a bit and not tracked his movement even if he go crapping in the loo.

and that kei75 kept pestering to get rid of my poor FT IT now out of job tenant. so i replied him:

what rental u talking? kena so many times 4d n toto...forget about it for the time being until poor tenant gets a new job and pay lor....emperor not anxious, the enunch is...tsk...tsk!

i am talking abour ur lumpar and par lum....keep changing ur name and nic for what...ur lousy soup ingredients are still the same...get it?.....even if ur name changed to AMITAHBA BUDDHA....ur lousy soup still remains....LOUSY!...then how? kena banned again...and make everyone siam u is it? then in the end u get big mirror hor...and start talking to ur ownself...if good accept...dun be so teekee chwee emmmh see....i will chant my ba jie head shrinking sutra on u...dun pray pray hor....

compassion...my dear boy...compassion....ornitoufo....;9)

and also my replied to the very interested aussieb...i think he more kaypoh than me....hahahaha...;9):


bro aussie...wah lau! u r damn good! power to ur wife man!!

if u were to be cjg....maybe i fall in love with u too...hahahahaha....jus kidding! and sbk would definitely be a happier and koh ka seow kar tong bei tiao....hahahaha...;9)

世 間 萬 物， 一 樣 克 一 樣。。。。。。

translated: in this vast universal, everything will be suppressed by every other thing........

eg: pinkie the clown guniang meeting butchie the manly wifey....what a weird and uncanny combination....;9)

...cont'd sibeikang and chinjiagong....

then my aussie brother posted:
From: aussiebiz 25-Feb 23:43
To: leetahsar 1218 of 1238

83628.1218 in reply to 83628.1213

Walau brother, this thread is going to reach the 'buay jin chu' numbers.

What is the next story? I oredi bought the ticket hor.

my reply:
suppose to go out again with sibeikang and wifey..and the gang of godsons...but i think better skip...every nite out until 2am...3 am...i seow man! (go crazzy like that)....tmr have to go temple do charity works....go now and i will be deadbeat tmr...how to work...

and yesternite....i just realised how glutton chinjiagong was....she walloped one big plate mee goreng with an egg. then she ordered one kambing (mutton) soup with bread...and one coffee with milk....then ordered another TISSUE PRATA...u know the roti prata u made it until so thin and crispy...and added one cut beef curry to it...

MY GOD! sibeikang is rearing a sow pig! and the beauty of the whole thing, she is quite slim...unlike me...eat a little bit too much only, the sparetyre will come out....

now...like busy reply to my chu ba jie and sun wo kong....and hopefully...sibeikang and wife settle their miscommunication and misunderstanding.

but from what i see, the likelihood of their marriage is in a rather precarious situation as cjg is quite a stubborn idiot...and poor sbk is half blur already...he slimmed down alot....

i hinted to him...if a wife brings a husband happiness and bliss beside the good F thing hor, the husband will look "prosperous" that is - a bit plump....

but the pre and post marriage of sbk is like a totally 2 different persons...pre marriage - happy, jovial seow kar bei tahan, a bit plump..

post marriage - sullen, drooling, melancholic, sad, serious. short tempered..no appetitie...and really thin down....

so u judge for urself...i think he married a wrong wife...or married too early...i dunno...like he din want to marry but dunno why ended up married...maybe he shotgun ccj...and therefore u know...marriage was the only convenient solution then....and now look what happen?

either u marry right or u stay single? marry wrong...u suffer pain pain for the rest of ur life....and other innocent party like his baby son will have to bear the SIN OF THE PARENTS.....chui guo chui guo....:9(

...and he just called when i was typing this....cjg was there with him and his gang of brothers...he was F bored! without me around, like he couldn't even link with all his brothers....jialat....his attachment to bo liao me.....like i am the only one who understands him....jialat me!!...going to be very bo eng.....

so inconvenient u know...the only girl there in a group of supposed boisterous loudmouthed guys...all so reserved and mindful what's coming out of their foul man's mouth...u know hor...when a butch of guys gather together...all sort of XXXX will pour out like nobody's business.....if cjg could be mindful of this and allow sbk more freedom.....so many ifs....

if they didn't marry in the first ....none of the present unhappiness would have resulted....sad...;9(

and the teekee kei75 in his new dunno what nic interrrupted...so i replied:
From: leetahsar 00:09
To: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 1222 of 1238

83628.1222 in reply to 83628.1219

goon's humble golden words:

DON'T TROUBLE TROUBLE UNTIL TROUBLE TROUBLE YOU........

this is kei75...the banned forummer is back! omg!!
From: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 25-Feb 14:23
To: leetahsar 1206 of 1238

83628.1206 in reply to 83628.1204

To: My dear Mr Lee Tah Sar aka Uncle Bob/"Boob"

Ok, i shall put myself into yr smelly shoe.

As long as he paid yr rental on time and every time, pls keep yr big ass mouth shut. If he doesn't do so, pls set him a certain deadline. Should he con't to default on his rental payment over an indefinite period, u should demand that he fuck off from yr Lee Tah Clan - House of Limited Compassion.

Sad that today I've to tell alot of people off. Even, u goon also bully me. If my wording is seen to be harsh and rude, may I seek yr good kind self to pls excuse me.

Hope that I did nt spolit yr day and may I wish u a pleasant weekend ahead. Thanks!

Regards

From: A nobody but extremely teekee boy

From: leetahsar 25-Feb 14:49
To: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 1207 of 1238

83628.1207 in reply to 83628.1206

i sensed today u r foul mooded...some one like wronged u...u bei tahan...me sensor on now...

as for me...THIS IS MY MONTH....MY BIRTHDAY TOO ON THIS MONTH...ME A PISCES...a very blur sotong fish....

why my month? cos hor...my 4d like going crazy...2 x lst prize...then all the little little consolation and $30 totos...then kena toto 5#s another 1k+...

so dun need the rental for this mth....i was thinking to tell him...he can go back first...and come back about 1 mth later...i give him 1 mth foc rental....wait for him to get the job...then his pay...then he can pay me...anyway...i already bought many instant korean mee for him...expensive one hor...$3.65 per pkt of 5...enough to last him until he finds a new job....poor boy...i sad for him....;9(

so...as for u...dun throw another rock or lup him another balls kick...ouch...MERCIFUL AND COMPASSIONATE HEART...no matter who the person is from...even he bangala or muslim or even terrorist i will also treat him the same...

ornitoufo....

and whatever is bothering him, i said this to him:

PEACE BE WITH U.....for whatever causes u ve sowed, u ve to reap the harvest now...whether it's good or bad, u gotta face it. if it's bad, then dun sow the same bad seeds again...if it's good, then pls continue to multiply the goodness......ornitoufo....

...and further reply to his lor sohness:

u r really funny and really teekee.....u keep changing ur name...when the simplest solution to ur clashes with people around u...is TO CHANGE URSELF BY EMBRACING UR PERSONAL FLAWS...MAKE A NOTE OF IT...AND TRY NOT TO COMMIT THE SAME MISTAKE AGAIN.....

simple as that....change the name of the soup; but the same lousy ingredients is the same....LP PL....

pinkie: HALLELUJAH!....THE OTHER PIC U JUS SEEN IS MY TRUE FORM....HALLELUJAH!! PRAISE THE LORD FOR GIVING ME BOOBIES THAT HUGE!!!!! AMEN....

.....YES...THIS IS THE REAL PINKIE THE CLOWN...HIS TRUE (inner) identity....and wifey is a man in disguise....we switch once the moon is full....our curses would be lifted...HALLELUJAH...HALLEELUJAH..HALLEEELUJAH...HA...LEE..LU...JAH!!!

A CHINESE POETRY....courtesy from a reader
From: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 25-Feb 12:59
To: leetahsar 1203 of 1238

83628.1203 in reply to 83628.1202

落魄江湖載酒行　楚腰纖細掌中輕
十年一覺揚州夢　贏得青樓薄倖名

he also advised me to chase out my FT IT tenant who just got the sack...yes, the big boot! and here's my reply to him:

<>

so if u were my kena sacked tenant, i tell u ...served u right...U BALEK KAMPONG...AND PLS PAY MY THIS MTH RENTAL BEFORE U CHAR BOK!...or else!

then how would u feel...my dear boy? if i do like u demanded, i am very bad and evil...and really lupping him with a nasty kick so he will fall from the precipice he's now precariously clinging by a small finger.....hahahaha...;9)

MERCIFUL..my dear boy....AND COMPASSION....u just dunno when it ur turn next to be hit by ASSLUCK!!!

ornitoufo.....to u especially...ornitoufo...;9)

lupping (goon language) = kicking (normal engrish) or smell my foot!(goon extreme engerish)

REMINISCING MY SWEET MEMOIRS....
.....IT'S SIBEIKANG'S TURN...cont'd.....

we were in the lorry heading towards pender rd at mt faber....and this area was where my last garden was located just at the foot of the hill....

we reached the customer's house, an ang mor lady from england. she wasn't back yet from work. it would be like another 30 minutes before she could get back after sbk called her office. good! means i got time to relive my wonderful memories here when i was running the garden.

i went all over the place....to my nursery at faber hill....my old man's shop at wishart road...and yes! the rambutan tree i planted along the main wishart road was really grown up handsomely....i couldn't bear it any longer.....i hugged my big rambutan laying my face to its lichened erected rough trunk....oh my rambutan!....how wonderfully and handsomely u have become!....then i climbed up the fence of the church which was once CIROS THEATRE....and i saw my even stately regia ROYAL PALM....oh, my royal palm...a weak little seedling i had grown u from a palm seed...and now look at u....such magnificiently stately tall....and yes!!!...yes!! my humongous mango tree....u are flowering now....how i miss u sweet big delicious fragrant apple mangoes....i could get like a big basket of mangoes...and my neighbour happened to be a chandler suppling foodstuffs to berthing ships. they love my mangoes too and bought from me to load to ship especially those coming from india and philippines .....and now....now it was but just a sweet sweet wonderful memories......*sniff...sniff*....to me.....;9(

i then went to look at THE SOKA ASSOCIATION...(previously known as THE NICHIREN BUDDHIST ASSN OF S'PORE)....my god! my landscape...my creation...all destroyed!!! the rocks formations i arranged...still there...but where the hell was the mini waterfall pool....GONE!!!....the pomelo tree i planted for their PRESIDENTO IKEA DAISAKU (he just claimed he planted by sticking "PLANTED BY SINSEH IKEDA"...but it was REALLY i who dug and planted the tree)....dead and gone!!!

then my special flowering garden which i created for them before they mercilessly terminated my contract without a good reason....and i did that for free....GONE....ALL GONE!!! OH SHIT !!! my very special ownself breed one PLUMEIRA spp...or frangipani...the colored one. and the one i specially planted there was with 2 colors. its petal was very cute: half the petal yellow; the other half red....GONE!!! ...gone.....:(

only the yellow cane palms that lined in between their premises screening off the next door SHELL PETROL KIOSK remained...and my goodness!! how wonderful and luscious have they grown....i was like meeting all my plants children.....my beautiful palms...and yes!! the callistemon (bottlebrush tree) was still there accompanying the huge granite rock.......and damn it! they chopped away the roll of traveller's palms at the other side of the fence.....the palms were so faithfully screening from them the very dazzling west setting sun rays....and they ruthlessly killed them all...sad :(

EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED.....and my creation was brutally raped and destroyed by the so called 'peace loving' soka buddhist practitioners....sad...very very sad ....'9(

oops!...i was suppose to report what transpired between sbk and cjg....sorry...sidetracked too far...next post, i will continue....now i go wipe my teary eyes....excuse me...pai seh...*sniff*.....

after i had all my reminiscing....i dragged my legs to walk up to pender rd when sbk was waiting patienly for the customer to return.

he was sitting there...drooling....sulking blanky. the moment he saw me arriving, he brightened up. he then told me we had to wait a bit longer cos ang mor lady needed to pick her child first before returning so both of us just sat at the roadside kerb and waited.

"sar, the other night while we were slurping our teochew porridge, u showed me ur hp....and i saw a message from ccj....can to tell me what u two were talking...is it about me?" the melancholic sibekang asked.

" no lah...already told u right...she asked me for my mean spaggi recipe..." i lamely replied as though his "kang" (shrewd and cunning) was for nothing or what...

"ok, ok...she revealed to me about all the past gfs...ur present and ongoing multi timing gfs....and especially ur evil teetujia....."

sbk's eyebrows nearly popped off his forehead...his small beady eyes was now like an owl...big and round and popping out soon!

"so maybe u like to finish ur 10 to 30% story u told me earlier..." i continued. "u r really kang....u tell me a little bit here and a bit there...and expect me to piece up the whole story which put u as the victimised husband..instead of the ruthless wife tormentor...." i gave him a very evil sarcastic smirk....;9)

sbk was quieten. he was solemn. i thought i saw beads of tears at his corners of his eyes.....he wiped and replied...."no lah sar....why everybody think i got something cheeky cheeky with teetujia?" "then u tell me lor...and please dun give me another 10% and make me finish story for u...i chak par bo hiak eng...!(eat full not free to guess)" i snapped.

blah...blah..blah.....blah...bo liao narration not worth writing....

"sar....i really regret marrying...i regret having a kid...i regret...." finally the real words in sbk's heart came out...:(

"sometime i think u and teetu is more compatible...then why married cjg?" i summarised. " but then again, if u married teetu as wifey...i think u will hump cjg as a sidekick.....and the same cycle repeats.....human especially horny man with deadly itchy fleas infested bloodhound...i really dun understand..."

sibeikang....blurred by this goon..this goon lagi blurred by sibeikang....

do you blurr too??......to be cont'd....

and wah lau, the ang mor por (english lady) returned.

"sorry boys to have kept u waiting....c'mon in the house.." she beckoned us.

once inside the house, she told us to wait for awhile, she get cheque. when she came out from her room....my god! she was only in skimmy panty and only a black singlet...and our bloodhounds...went woooweee!! wraaff wraaff.....howl...howl...!!!! .......;9)...and that guys and girls would be another imaginative fictitious XXX story in the making....hahahaha....

real one hor...not bluffing...but ang mor por's boobies flat as a plane runaway

THE NATIONAL PLEDGE OF THE GOON
From: leetahsar 21-Feb 14:40
To: ALL 1 of 15

93853.1

I think this pledge definitely applies after erection....

THE GOON PLEDGE:

we the peasants of sinkieland

flogged ourselves as one disunited goonies

shameless of face,lampar or leeligion

to build a demonic society

based on injustice and definitely inequality

so as to avoid happines, prosperity and maybe

disgress for our nation...

...sad hor...;9(....and very pai seh to my beloved land...

...and rajarathnam konged of on 22 feb 06....so co-incidental....sibeikang said my adaptation of the national pledge caused his demise...i told him dun anyhow said....u mean i just write like that....then someone's more infuential one may kong off again...so powderful huh my words...? ;9(

.....IT'S SIBEIKANG'S TURN...cont'd.....

p pppp pp! sbk's lorry downstair horning. ran down the steps and off we went for his round of mattresses delivery....

lst stop: BENCOOLEN RESIDENCE. location: WATERLOO ST...

reached there in a jiffy. but there was a mini jam there...and some van was already at the pte condo which was just next to the WATERLOO'S GUAN YIN TEMPLE. sbk was very versatile in such troublesome matter. he drove one round and parked at the service road just behind a piece of void field where there was an exhibition.

as he parked at a double-yellowed line road, he told me to wait in the car while he singlehandedly carried a queen-sized mattress from the lorry, crossed the road to bencoolen residence, the pte condo......

i was damn boring waiting in the lorry c b l (cho bo lan) {doing nothing}. then i noticed that the exhibition at the opened field was actually ended and workers were loading up the stuffs in the exhibition.

one of the thing they were loading up was a huge lifesize MAITREYA BUDDHA. Then they were proceeding to hoist up another buddha - THE 4-FACED BUDDHA.

it was quite interesting so i alighted the lorry and went closer to watch. the huge statue was finally securely placed on top of the lorry.

suddenly there was a gust of strong wind. oh my buddha! the thin golden leaves which were pasted on the 4-faced buddha went flying...and my god! they were all flying towards me!

i couldn't siam and avoid in time....and was pasted all over...my hair, my body ...everywhere cos i was only wearing a singlet and a shorts and in sandals and was sweaty all over.

goodness! golden leaves were actually - if i m not wrong - 24K gold or 99.9999 fine type. only this type of gold purity is soft enough to be hammered out into very filmsy thin gold leaves which devotees paste them on the buddha....and now i was all pasted over.

bee thang! (rice bowl - means jackpot!) without further ado, i quickly picked up all the gold films. removed those that stuck to my sweaty body and hair.....put them all in a plastic bag. goodness! i think got at least 5g....i go check tmr how much is that......;9)....

and soon sibeikang returned....huffing and puffing....and complaining that the location of the client's address was damn damn difficult to find and damn far away....

we boarded the lorry and off we went to another location...

PS. My solemn condolence to rajarathnam for his pass on...and sibeikang told me about our national pledge...u know the "we the citizens " thing...

he said, "tarshar...u very zer er!!...u go and re-write the NATIONAL PLEDGE OF THE GOON....and we the citizen becomes we the peasants...and all those craps...and then now how.... the next day raja dropped dead....! hahahahaha...!"

sorry...i was innocent...how i was to know he wrote that national pledge and how i know i re-write today...and the next day he was dead as reported....not my fault...dun blame me...i dunno.....;9(

after chinjiagong, it' sibeikang's turn.....

oh shit! why did i lent my hp to sibeikang unwittingly? luckily i deleted most of chinjiagong's smses except one...

"TAhsar, u free now? pls call me..."

then the interrogation of leetahsar began....

"what did she talk to u about?" sbk started.

"what...what?" me defence up. "no lah, she asked me to give her my mean spaggi recipe lah...why leh?"

"pls leh, sar...tell me leh....i damn pek chek u know!"

"about what...ur teetujia? u miss bonking ur teetujia after ur jb satays is it?" i replied rather sarcastically.

"told u nothing happen after the satay....why u dun believe me leh?" sbk liked closed to tear...like a little boy being wrongly accused.

"aiyah! kang....u did nothing wrong...there's nothing to fear....."

....shit! sbk called...time off...got free makan...will report tonight...cherrio and ciao!

then a reader interrupted:
From: postnew 24-Feb 14:06
To: leetahsar 1191 of 1238

83628.1191 in reply to 83628.1189

<< luckily i deleted most of chinjiagong's smses except one... >>

heng ah... or not another famous 10 minutes video ( Tammy) will hit the market.

*Tammy was the latest faze happening in this sinkieland. she is a NANYANG POLYTECHIC student who used her handhpone to film her XXX different positions lovemaking with her bf...andy (i think). then she lost her handphone. some joker picked it and download the whole xxx scene in the internet....and now it's the talk and rage of the town...police are trying to locate the downloader and hell! once found out, this joker is going to get it pain pain...it's 10 mins display is even on sale in e-bay.

today sunday's times reported that it was already distributing in penang for a price of MR$10 (s$4.5) for a piece of DVD .....

From: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 24-Feb 15:21
To: postnew 1192 of 1238

83628.1192 in reply to 83628.1191

Tammy Chin n Bob Lee production?

From: leetahsar 24-Feb 20:04
To: postnew 1193 of 1238

83628.1193 in reply to 83628.1191

omg! why am i always omg now? one more time...oh my buddha!!!

cjg and sbk already very messy with the intervention of teetujia...and now there's another gf and another gf...my buddha!! getting very very entreating and confusing....just like my italian pal's charpalang paolo bonk fernando + monica bonk gloria bonk franscisco bonk hrc ...wah lao eh! all this bonking, laying, jacking, humping...poking...sucking...licking..frenchie...are overloading my otherwise tranquility...and now cjg and sbk and ttj and gf..and gf...my god...history repeating...and actually guan wo pi si!!!??? ....;9(

so, chu ba jie and sun wo kong, can u 2 pls dun aggravate and drive ur tang san chan sifu banana with 2 big coconuts....can or not huh? pls leh?...i m going explode pretty soon.....;9(....and so give me a few minutes....let me calm down and i report what happen when i abruptly went with sibeikang...many thing happened...one of which i was covered with....GOLD LEAVES....24K GOLD LEAVES....STAY TUNED....

and the ultimate beauty...MONALISABEAN

我美女实在太多了，我爽死了!

but how leh....me monk leh...phoenix meats so many can see, salivate but cannot eat....me vegetarian...hor hah? damn heng...and damn suay at same time....;9(

... and this is what they mean by my 美女.....







cum to think of it ...ya hor!...i still got my kyoto fattie cute gf...my swedish mermaid EVA JOHANSSON...JAMBU like anything...and yes....my korean sassy gf...LIM seok-yong....let me see who i left out...oh shit! even my postwoman AH MEi who last time used to send my letters right to my doorstep instead of dumping in my letterbox...jialat wonder did that special service got her the sack...pai seh leh....;9)

omg....now more stories being recalled...ya...all this Gs i almost forget...u r damn right u know...

.....and he blames it on his "electric eyes"......a funny pic from postnew.

From: postnew 24-Feb 10:20
To: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 1159 of 1210

83628.1159 in reply to 83628.1158

<< 我美女实在太多了，我爽死了! >>



he blame it on his 'electric' eyes.

AND my good brother from oz AUSSIEB has this to say about my GAYS AND LESBOS posting:
From: aussiebiz 23-Feb 21:52
To: leetahsar 1147 of 1203

83628.1147 in reply to 83628.1105

>>>...when we term some guy "gay" or girl "lesbo", what are we refering to?...<<<

Today our society is much 'open' when compared with say the 50s, 60s or even 70s. The popular amusement park Gay World so named because the place was meant to provide fun, joy, cheer and happiness to the visitors. I'm sure when the name was coined many years ago, most ppl would agree that it (the name) was appropriate. The visitors to Gay World consist of ppl from all walks of life incl. gays and lesbians. Back then who would make fun of the name Gay World and refer that place as a joint for gays? Gay and lesbian activities then were rather 'hush hush' unlike today even in a control environment in SGP these activities are rather common. I am sure present day if a similar amusement park is call Gay World, most ppl refer to the place as a joint for gays. If there is no such thing as majority or minority like what you said, then heaven forbid you will have a big mix up here: man/girl/girl/man/girl/girl/man/man relationships!

and i replied him:
From: leetahsar 23-Feb 23:57
To: aussiebiz 1149 of 1203

83628.1149 in reply to 83628.1147

sorry brother...i ve unwittingly made u writing and hand in ur homeworks to me...or else start writing lines...pai seh...

actually i met to click...ALL...i forgot when i click the REPLY in ur posting...

anyway...good hor...at least u r writing now.....yes...u r all right...and i salute u for ur openess too and mindfulness to the very subject at heart and happening now....

and i am so surprise that no flame throwers at me...or lame name calling and insults that i might be a guniang, faggots or whatever those losers can think of...heng ah! u know...

actually hor....i dunno lah...if i say this which i am suppose not to...cos i said it ...it would lose its power by at least 40%...ok...i can't tahan...i ve to say it...

although i m not a monk now...only a wannabe...but good enough monk material....PEOPLE WHO THROW INSULTS AND CURSES AT MONK - different from mine at the botak - will beget ill-will and ass luck in return....therefore if u notice my reply to them...i even help them to curse myself so that they won't be hit...since a monk is also cursing himself...so why can't other curse him leh.....now i said it means....i won't get precious lessons from curses and swears from lamers already...dunno whether it's good or bad for my spiritual training...

like i always said...IF I DUN GO TO HELL, WHO WILL?.....think about this phrase...and u will truely appreciate the intrinsic beauty of buddhism...the all loving compassion of the universe....ornitoufo....;9)
From: aussiebiz 24-Feb 01:05
To: leetahsar 1150 of 1203

83628.1150 in reply to 83628.1149

Exactly what this forum is all about .... talk cock, flaming (more for the hot tempered and born losers), sing song, etc. .... but of course there are also discussions of mutual interest and self improvement. If you look at most of the threads you posted (I think I must hv read most of them), there are at least 85 to 90 % supporters. By that I mean they do find the discussions like some sort stress relief. Most are happily hammering away their keyboard. I have noticed several formmers here incl you that knows how to keep your cool. IMHO that is the most valuable asset of a participant in the forums and chat rooms. What do you think?

From: leetahsar 24-Feb 01:20
To: aussiebiz 1151 of 1203

83628.1151 in reply to 83628.1150

dunno lei...maybe me a goon...so dunno how to lose temper...except when the bloody lau han koo..started his violence first...and i blocked until cannot blocked then i retaliated...

today i kena 4D not much $60...and i belanja him and tenant...to timsum...$43...poor tenant kena sacked today....so i tried cheered him up today too..

A CHINESE POEM FROM A READER...

From: 纪晓岚 (jixiaolan) 23-Feb 15:59
To: leetahsar 1127 of 1203

83628.1127 in reply to 83628.1126

In life, I ask for nothing.

無知井裡蛙　徒望添聲價
空得意目光如麻
誰料金屋變敗瓦

命裡有時終須有
命裡無時莫強求

雷聲風雨打　何用多驚怕
心公正白璧無瑕
行善積德最樂也

君可見漫天落霞
名利息間似霧化

WE WRITE OUR OWN STORIES.....

our life depends on us...not on some dead cock or pussy...

there's no such thing as destiny. if there is, then everyone here is a pathetic robot created by the Maker.

we write our own story...and depending on how we want to end our story...whether it's going to be happily ever after or u can sulk for the rest of ur miserable life....it's entirely up to us to finish our story....

so...if one dead cock or pussy has hit the plank...then move on lor....it's our life to live...their's already GAME OVER...and we will be ultra super stupid to let dead meat affect the live ones...agree?

From: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 23-Feb 12:20
To: leetahsar 1107 of 1203

83628.1107 in reply to 83628.1106

Boo, Seriously, u should consider writing a book. There'll be a market, IMHO.

From: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 23-Feb 13:40
To: leetahsar 1112 of 1203

83628.1112 in reply to 83628.1111

Is morality still relevant in a modern society?

For just $3.99, he do this n openly "disclaimed" from any responsibility:-

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=5669846094

K some kind soul advise him that law is nt meant for the purpose to protect bastard like him, nor it'll be interpreted in such a way.

From: leetahsar 23-Feb 15:08
To: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 1113 of 1203

83628.1113 in reply to 83628.1111

aiyh! another same specie goon that made this goon king happily floating....wait...i float by ur place....;9)

From: leetahsar 23-Feb 15:14
To: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 1114 of 1203

83628.1114 in reply to 83628.1112

if we hor...the cows....dun go drink their water...they can't force us, isn't it?

so if u curiously want to see their live performance...which i think i ve seen better one for free by surf porn sites....i skip.

thanks...and no thanks...to the pubicless hairless boy boy. if he's arnold simiwakor....i dun mind at least can see muscles flexing...or pamela anderson...i dun mind...at least can see clearly when those artificial siliconed boobs are going to burst,,,,

pubicless hairless boy boy and airport runaway bosom...siah or not......nothing stimulating leh....;9)

From: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 23-Feb 15:17
To: leetahsar 1115 of 1203

83628.1115 in reply to 83628.1114

Hey, i neber ask u to watch. I just asked u to condemn the seller.

From: leetahsar 23-Feb 15:21
To: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 1116 of 1203

83628.1116 in reply to 83628.1115

for what....to each his free will....nothing to condemn. in fact admire them for their brashfulness and guts....u dare to publicise it if u were the lead actor?

no right? so admire them lor...but won't buy from them...LAME!








From: leetahsar 23-Feb 12:24
To: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 1108 of 1203

83628.1108 in reply to 83628.1107

u sponsor is it?...still got 1000 and one stories not up yet u know...my cambodia trip...my holland..usa...japan..taiwan...hk...etc..




Options Reply Delete Edit




From: postnew 23-Feb 12:26
To: leetahsar 1109 of 1203

83628.1109 in reply to 83628.1108

<< u sponsor is it?...still got 1000 and one stories not up yet u know...my cambodia trip...my holland..usa...japan..taiwan...hk...etc.. >>

pee..shit.. underwears... itchy backside.. black holes...


Options Reply




From: leetahsar 23-Feb 12:37
To: postnew 1110 of 1203

83628.1110 in reply to 83628.1109

dun these interested u more than paps increased that...paps voted in again..all the lagi bo liao..things..

these things i written are closer at heart than those which we can't control...these i written are within our means...and dun they add colors to this otherwise boring days...esp...mondays...


Options Reply Delete Edit




From: ¼ÍÏþá° (jixiaolan) 23-Feb 13:02
To: leetahsar 1111 of 1203

83628.1111 in reply to 83628.1108

Hmm..I'll support by buying one or borrow it from National Library. Workfare, no welfare for u. I've nt gone through much here, but i like the ones on play gorli, temple visit n even yr sibeikang/FT tenant tales. Interesting read for a local chap like me.


Options

GAYS AND LESBOS....
when we term some guy "gay" or girl "lesbo", what are we refering to?

that the majority are straight...and therefore the minority is gay....but suppose there is not such thing as majority and minority....then how do u refer that term gay or lesbo....with reference to what?

i put it in another simple way to understand....

1, 2, 3, 4, 5.......10

if there isn't a 1....then how could u describe a 2...with reference to what?? and then a 3 is bigger than 2 but definitely smaller than 4....and twice bigger than 1.......

they are but a nbr of reference which cannot exist if the other 9 nbrs are not there....

if there's isn't any straights...then there won't be people ostracising the gays...cos they are the minority in reference to the majority.....can get it everyone?

again....if there's no poor peasants...would there be rich obsence paps? no! it's a reference again.....they have to make themselve obscenely rich so that it can differ from the obscenely poor...namely us.

so if they dun make an effort that everyone become equal...then forever this sinkieland would remain unbalanced. the rich getting richer...the poor getting poorer....

so that there is a devious reference to tell the poor...LOOK AT ME...I M OBSCENCELY RICH WHEN COMPARED TO U....

but then again...compare the paps to maybe someone like bill gates...they themselves would in turn becomes obscenely poor...

IT'S ONLY A REFERENCE...if think in the big whole universal complete context...we are the same...cos we come empty handed...and we shall defintely leave empty handed....ornitoufo....

the world's equilibrium have changed and shifted....

if a guniang clown could be our pm, what else couldn't happen? maybe the problems lie in us.....we judge too much....too often...too extreme to be so unforgiving and unaccomodating.....

within the norm, ok to everyone. APPROVAL.

outside this norm, then it's no no. CURSES, SWEARS AND MORE CURSES.....

PEOPLE PLS WAKE UP! THE WORLD HAS CHANGED!

male loves male. female loves female. even cowboy is loving cowboy...the cowgirls can go milk a cow. (BROKENBACK MOUNTAIN).

this queer kind of love is taking over by storm. it's sweeping the whole world whether we like it or not.

look at me a goon swimming freely and happily in a quite deserted pool. then what? male spidey accosting me...and real chiohunk type that could melt any chiobus...

why? what do they see in me? a blur old goon sotong just swimming with not a care in the world?.....but i feel their inner emptiness...their anguish of rejection...not by me...but by the society at large.

is it a crime if he's born like that? people can accept naturally born handicap, natural born blinds, natural born defective people....why can't they also accept naturally born right sex in the wrong underwears kinds?

ostracise....that's what most cold hard people here do....anyone that's possess this unfortunate personality will be mercilessly ostracised, cursed, swore and even spat on...worst lamers losers take advantages of this situation and glorify themselves by continuous condemnation of this group of pitiful people.

but do u feel their inner pain and anguish? do u think they wanted to be born this way? if u can accept and have compassion for naturally handicapped people, why can't u be compassionate to this even more unfortunate sad people.

the handicapped only suffers physical inconvenience....the sexually deviated not only suffer physical torments, they suffer an even more serious uncalled for mental and spiritual torment.

cos the bible also branded it wrong to love the same sex.....

only buddhism accomodate to all sentient beings including the gays and the lesbians....i hope to end this humble opinion and eye opener to everyone reading this posting...to each his/her preference.

REMEMBER: WE FLOW THE SAME COLORED BLOOD....

peace be with u all and ornitoufo...san chai san chai.....

*BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN is now screening and taking the movie by storms. it's about gay love between 2 cowboys and directed by lee ang.
since it's the talk of the town, maybe i go watch as i ve many free cinema passes....

THE SAGE OF BAN SIEW SAN CONTINUES...
i was at another post...http://forums.delphiforums.com/sammyboymod/messages
and someone replied on my kampong days....my kampong BAN SIEW SAN. It stirs up beautiful vivid memories which i will share with u now...

From: tohgoh 09:47
To: leetahsar 28 of 37

93688.28 in reply to 93688.10



Man shau san kampong. You from there?

From: leetahsar 10:02
To: tohgoh 29 of 37

93688.29 in reply to 93688.28

u definitely r not a hokien....ur hokien very chimp and slang.

BAN SIEW SAN....or HILL OF THE MILLION LONGEVITY...literally translated.

From: leetahsar 10:03
To: tohgoh 30 of 37

93688.30 in reply to 93688.28

oops...sorry...u r not talking in hokien...u jus spoken cantonese...sorry hor...this goon just waken up and haven't washed up yet....pai seh...;9)

From: tohgoh 10:11
To: leetahsar 31 of 37

93688.31 in reply to 93688.29

Yeah, you are right. Me Si Yup. There's cantonese living there at that times. But speak hokkien because surrounding majority are hokkien. My Mom in-herited the pai tee kong practise because in one of the years, she ask Tee kong for help and it did. It's has been some 50 years since, and she would prepare all the yummy fruits on the 8th days of every CNY without fail.

If you remember, there's one very old lady would climb up the hill and pray at the temple on-top of man shau shan virtually every morning. That's my Great grandma. Also, my uncle saw the Laughing buddha appearing at the stairways halfway up the temple.

The altar use to be my brothers favourite hang out. All the kids like them would be made to craw thru and under the altar table for good luck. Then people would buy the huge circular incense coil to hang at the temple. All those ah-soh would then distribute the goodies bag that contain sweet and cookies...:D Too bad, force to move when me 3 years old.

From: leetahsar 10:30
To: tohgoh 32 of 37

93688.32 in reply to 93688.31

u were neighbours to goddess of mercy is it? i mean u lived next to her house...i mean temple?

From: tohgoh 10:45
To: leetahsar 33 of 37

93688.33 in reply to 93688.32

Not very sure, me BB then leh. Should be behind, about 1 house away if I remember my brothers description correctly.


From: leetahsar 10:54
To: tohgoh 34 of 37

93688.34 in reply to 93688.33

meaning ur enjoyment of kampong wild life is quite limited and brief....cos when i was in like primary 6, the bulldozers came.....and my beautiful lovable ban siew san was no more....*sigh*.....:(

From: tohgoh 11:01
To: leetahsar 35 of 37

93688.35 in reply to 93688.34

But now also not bad there. All the 3 temples still there. One along Keppel road, and 2 on the hill. There's a CC next to Yeo Clans building. And those Point blocks are consider prime area leh. :D Ah...I remember my mum mention that she learn how to cook curry from our neighbours, a malay lady. Or maybe nonya? Hahahah....Then my elder sis would tell me which kopi stall she bring me for big bun, those stretch before the cinema (now a church). Last time big bun not like now. I remember it's as big as my head :-) There's lap cheong, pig intestine, pig stomach, fatty and juicy 3 layer pork, quail egg, mushroom, etc....

From: leetahsar 11:13
To: tohgoh 36 of 37

93688.36 in reply to 93688.35

yes..yes...THAt Cinema was called CIROS...i still remember.

when mamalee finished laying 5 of us siblings, lauhankoo used to bring us for chinese swordfighting flims usually starred wang yu or chen pei pei or both.

he always paid only 4 tickets for 7 of us. i would share my seat with carot lee and my 3 sisters would seat on one other seat...those were the days.....

and ticket only cost 50c for ground level seats. the upper or circle seat only $1.

and naughty rich kids who sat at circle seats always spat from above or threw all kind of funny rubbis down...usually peanut shells...unlucky carot - my ding dong brother - once even got a chewing gun thrown from above and stuck to his hair. in the end, mamalee got to snip a big turf off his crop leaving him with an awful exposed lobang on his scalp....hahahaha...;9)

From: leetahsar 11:25
To: tohgoh 37 of 37

93688.37 in reply to 93688.35

...i think u must had also tried my grandma - grannygirl in my UPHEAVAL OF LEETAHSAR - prawn noodles, nasi lemak...ice kachang....oh shit! i said this u sure know who i am now....

anyway, the stalls facing the church METHODIST CHURCH which is still there belonged to PSA....THE whole Market next to the church and the whole long stretch of 2 storeys houses facing the main road up to the TAMIL METHODIST CHURCH...the petrol kiosk...then S'PORE SOKA - however belongs to the church...

my shop was at one of the row there....if u go there now u will see the current "tourists butchering shop" in its place...u will see by the side a majestic royal palm and mango tree. u will also see a rambutan tree which i openly planted along the main wishart road....i was hoping to belanja everyone who would like to try its fruit....damn crunchy and sweet u know...a special breed i smuggled out from the then PPD or primary production dept farm in lim chu kang.

speaking of this bloody church, it conned my old man's business premises after he rented from them for more than 25 yrs...up till now i still can't believe a christian church is just as nasty or even worst then any other avaricious scheming landlord....so did the whole market of hawkers...THE WHOLE BUNCH ALSO KENA CONNED PAIN PAIN BY THIS CHURCH...

AND worst my old man's rented church premises was a property donated away by its former owner whose son one fine day dropped by and told me the whole story that his old man bought the place for only like 60K and it's FREEHOLD some more...and upstair and downstair....THOSE WERE REALLY THE GOOD OLD DAYS!

UPHEAVAL OF SIBEIKANG .....PART 2

AND NOW IT WAS CHINJIAGONG'S TURN......

was typing my bo liao net posting yesterday afteroon, suddenly the cellphone beeped...i pressed a key to see who was smsing me. oh my god! of all people....chinjiagong just smsed me and asked me to call her.

"hi ccg! whassup?" i asked.

"hello, tarshar is it?....did sibeikang said anything about that valentine's night karaoke?" ccg started her queries.

"ya...he told me before u two came out, u all were actually quarrelling over a silly bouquet of valentine day roses, right?" i asked back.

she was stunned. awkard silence. "i definitely dun want flowers that he also gave a similar bunch to his teetujia!"

"but why....u jealous? it was teetujia's birthday too u know? and both of them already knew each other way before sbk knows u..." , i explained like a know-all.

"but beside that, do u know that he has another girl....?"

"Huh?...what? another gf....OH MY GOD!" i was shocked. "u mean sbk is not two timing...but 3 timing....wah lau! he damn steady poon pee pee leh....!"

and she proceeded to pour all her upheavals to me...crying in between narration, and narrating in between asthmatic sobs....

all this while my mouth was opening bigger and bigger in sheer shock of the rolatoing of sbk.....i couldn't believe it...really. he was not only good...he was super!

and she cried, sobbed, yelled, shrieked frantically....and soon it was like 2 hours of sob opera just passed before my ears....:(

i couldn't stand it any longer cos my ears were already sweaty from all the incessants words, complainings, sobbings...etc...so i told ccg i had to stop as i was hungry and need to eat. conversation thus ended. heng ah!

LAUHANKOO'S BACK FROM THE LAND OF THE SPIDER SPIRITS....

yesterday was family day for my siblings. with the absence of lauhankoo who went to the land of the spider spirits namely china, mamalee was greatly inspired to cook up a storm.

we had fa cai dried oysters with braised mushrooms and chicken feet. popiahs. kong bah pao (stewed belly pork with pao), fish fritters, veggies, shiok soup, steamed promfet....and many more.

after we were dead stuffed, mamalee dug up hashima in red dates soup - a very expensive dessert. she told us she paid almost $50 for the hashima which were actually frogs' sperms. very nutritious. very good for the skin. makes u smooth and retards ageing....

and everyone thought that was about all. but no! out came fried banana fritters and her special niang gao which is a kind a polish rice gluey stuff that i skipped. very sticky to the teeth.....and really very gummy type which i didn't fancy.

but the gang of siblings was supping like anything...and suddenly....

LAUHANKOO stepped in....and the joy and fun turned tense.

he just returned from his sperm missile target practicing on his mei mei cheena spiders...and in china this time.

gayly, he unwrapped 2 packages of newspaper wrappings. guess what inside there?........ and guess what else he brought back?

......brought back 2 homongous pieces of roasted meat. everyone wondered how he managed to by-pass custom detection. goodness! means that terrorists could easily shore up here too....:(

then he opened up another packet of shredded greens and fried fish skins. mixed them together and he threw in 2 packets of funny looking...smelled weird watery dressings. then tossed the whole mess up and walloped with loud surpings....

the way he ate seem damn delicious. i tried too. my god! the shredded greens were actually green unripe mangoes. funny though, it wasn't sour, it was rather sweet and crunchy. eaten with those funny looking dressings and the fried fish skins, it really tasted wonderful!

and mamalee started yelling at me again. "Sar, u greedy ding dong piggy! ....dun u know that's what lauhankoo brought back one huh? if it's hexed, u will suffer and maybe die pain pain...!"

well, not dead yet and still hammering away at the keyboard to post u this....;9)

place cursor above blank space and click "open in another window"

HOW TO SAVOUR LIVE COCKROACHES

u forgot hor...me garang ex-kampong boy.

let me describe how u can savour a live cockroach. pay full attention now:

1. catch live cockroaches. put them in plasic bags

2. start charcoal fire

3. tone down fire.

4. grab firmly wriggly roach by its tummy.

5. with the other hand, twist it's head off. slowly pull it upwards. u see all the innards coming out. discard innards.

6. throw the by now quite dead headless carcass into glowing charcoal...and sniff....wow...shiok shiok aroma...;9)

7. flip carcass the other side. roast for another minute or two.

8. get chopstick and grab cooked roach...and savour..shiok!...just like crispy cuttlefish...

those who can't tahan what i just did, can go puke ur guts out!

benefit to body: no fats, no cholesterol...and free.....;9)

if cat and dog can be friends, why can't the american be a doll too?



and teletubbies become tali-tubbies

the next skyscrapper osama going to bomb?

DICKHEAD OSAMA BIN LADEN....the terrorist chief

href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/osama_bean.jpg">

and the british goon laughter terrorist, MR BEAN LADEN

THE CARTOON THAT STARTED ALL THE MUSLIMS NONSENSICAL VIOLENCE AND KILLINGS....WHAT A SHAME! :9(

href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/BUSHOSAMA.jpg">
IF BUSH AND OSAMA COULD BE LOVERS....HOW PEACEFUL THIS WORLD WOULD BE

THE CARTOON THAT STARTED ALL THE MUSLIMS NONSENSICAL VIOLENCE AND KILLINGS....WHAT A SHAME! :9(

ROAD RAGES IN SINKIELAND......ALL FOR NOTHING...
click this URL...and watch. dunno whether to laugh or cry after watching....very funny and very stupid....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJsk_iob-w0&search=singapore

LIZARDS CATCHING IN KAMPONG DAYS....

actually during kampong days, lizards catching was one of my favorite past time.

we used the main vein from the coconut leaf...after stripping of the leaf, u get the stick with very long fine thread ending. we tied the ending into a loop ...u know like the cowbody lasso...and tied a piece of cotton wool behind the loop.

then we sticked this self made gadget into the lobangs where the lizards dwell..u can feel the lizard eating and tugging at the cotton wool, then u give a swift pull. out came the lizard looped in the loop tightly struggling like a hooked fish..

next play with the lizard. we tied a thread round the lizard's neck...and pulled it along like a puppy...some sadistic children worst..broke their tail and see it wriggled frantically...

so fun...the joy of catching one hanging on ur coconut stick is priceless!

CROAKING, RINGING AND UPGRADING......

every fortnightly, i m suffering from the horrendous chicken slaughtering screams from the lau huay lians just below my block where there is anuseless opened air amphitheatre for all these old croakers.....who croak and shriek and screech for hours during the night with full blast stereos.

mental torture....as if this is not enough....sometime right in the middle of ur sound sleep, the bloody fire alarm in the nearby multi-storey carpark will kong off and ring incessantly for hours ....

this is upgrading....of course, lah...upgrade our suffering otherwise living here is really too peaceful and tranquil....:9(

before upgrading, i used to have lovely big shady raintrees. so cooling and a soothing sight. after upgrading all chopped chopped and planted with useless shadeless palms which always die due to beetles and diseases attack.

before upgrading, we ve carpark next to coffeeshop which was doing a roaring business. after, coffeeshop is dead ...and maybe should change into coffinshop. so many owners changed hands already and still can't survive even food is so cheap....eg. char siew with shou rou only $2..where can get? but still banked!

and the old carpark was turned into torturing amphitheatre...with scream croaking old chickens crowing every fortnight...can go crazy u know.

built multi-carpark in place of a once lovely spacious field where doggies can do their business and children ran, played football and flied kites...now stupid carpark sadistic fire alarm always torturing me in my sleep...and carpark is always quite bare and under utilised.

complained to the lame chay wai chuen, our hopeless mp....and scared the shits of him the last time he knocked on my doors....so embarrased i dun think he dares to come 100 ft near to my pigeonholes anymore...kena marked already...go anywhere but must die die siam leetahsar's 2 pigeonholes. if not sure kena bombed like hell from him like the last lau kwuee (embarrassing) encounter...hahahha....;9(

upgrading was so messy for 3yrs plus...and i din get my extra 80 sq ft room...if not i would ve 2 extra rooms to rent...and hell! i ve to pay for 2 stupid upgraded toilets which always spoilt....something like 3.5K each x 2

UPGRADING...WHAT A BRILLIANT CON JOB BY THE PAPS TO SUCK US DRY AGAIN!

;9(
tell u a real life joke story....my mum is also in the active croakers group. she told me already 2 deaths in her group.

the over enthusiastic croakers were so excited to sing...that when they hit the high stressful note, they actually kong off and literally dropped dead!

another lau auntie worst still....konged din die but not paralysed. she suffered a miserable debilitating stroke....and now in wheelchair and slur in her speech....poor auntie...:(

do u know that every week some old chaps will kong off here in my estate....there was once even damn super.....5 at one go....and there were like funerals everywhere for every 10 steps u walk...sheesh!...what a record breaking dark day here!
and yes! those boisterous tong tong ching are even worst....hours and hours even through the nights...MY GOD!

there was an even funnier incident. a old neighbour staying downstair of me konged off and nobody knew until his pigeonhole smelled....*eeeoh**

the next early morning, i got a bunch of 4 undertakers ah peks hammering my door. my irritated lauhankoo went to open it. the first thing that hit him was..."HERE WO LAN C BO?" (HERE GOT PEOPLE DIE IS IT?)

choy! choy! choy! my hankoo yelled at them....then a young guy came running to our doorstep. he apologised feverishly saying that the bunch of blur ah peks came to the wrong place...it should 6th floor not 9th floor...

damn jialat! and have me rolling in uncontrollable laughter at their goofiness...but my lanhankoo kept choying and choying behind them...cursing and swearing the daylight off those old blur goons....hahahaha...;9)

one of my reader was banned from the the forums i frequent...

i got a rather disquieting email for the otherwise teekee but good at heart kei75....already warned and hinted to him....and now it happens to him. he kena "banned". from what and who...he din say, and i m blurr what he means "he got banned." why?

so now i c n p - like i m damn good at this c n p action now :) - for u all to see. anyone can enlighten me on what may have happen to him?....like already missed him for all his teekeeness.....:(

This message from KEI75 is in reply to your message
"UPHEAVAL OF LEETAHSAR....." in Sammyboy.com's Alfresco Coffee Shop on Delphi
Forums.

To view this message in the context of the discussion,
visit http://forums.delphiforums.com/sammyboymod/messages/?msg=83628.1061

=======================Text of Reply=======================

Wah, Lee Tah Sar...u hor beri the kaypoh lah...nt that he din pay 4 his rent.
Hmm...anyway, if u still dunno, i'm now banned by that fucking asshole, nt that
i care anyway.
http://forums.delphiforums.com/sammyboymod/messages?msg=92937.111
if i'll 2 look 4 u, i'll know how 2 contact u.
2day is Valentine day, wish u n yr luv ones a pleasant occasion.
Regards

THE AUTO WANKER WITH VARIED SPEEDS

href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/30mdiamondbikini.jpg">
THE HOT BABE WHO COMES WITH 30M WORTH OF DIAMONDS
href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/animated-toilet-paper-washroom-humor-photos.gif">
THE AUTO LICKING TOILET PAPER...FOR THE HOUND AND FOR THE MOON WITH A HOLE AT THE SAME TIME....

WHAT A SINGLE DESPERATE MAN WANTS.....

THE PENIS ROCK

href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/penistree.jpg">
THE TREE WITH A PENIS TRUNK
href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/cockrock.jpg">
A HUGH HARD DICK...THAT'S WHAT WOMEN WANT.....

EVERYTHING ABOUT PENISES

this is my godson's jack russell, RUSSELL. he's in USA and so is his sinkiedog who went with him....and now also an American PR dog.

href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7746/1900/1600/cutepiggy.jpg">

this is the cute and greedy piggy leetahsar.....:)

UPHEAVAL OF SIBEIKANG....dunno what better describe him now

poor sibeikang. on valentine's day, it was suppose to be a romantic surprise he planned for weeks for the wifey chiajiagong. unexpectedly, it turned out worst than his worst nightmare....

one day before D DAY......sibeikang ordered roses for wifey. as he was busy the whole day, he was only free quite late after 10pm night. by then most florists closed shops and stopped orders already.

his other resort...E florists. he found one and contact and placed order through smses....unwary that behind his back chinchiagong was observing. suspicion filled her distorted mind. wild negative imaginations were running like strayed bullets blasting every rational thoughts and trust she had on sibeikang.

"who r u smsing?....sending love msgs to teetujia is it?" she asked sarcastically.

sibeikang was irritated and was about to answer her when his cellphone rang... he answered. chinjiagong snapped and her loud blast of stereos started blaring while sibeikang was talking over the phone.

it was the florist who called to confirm the order. that is to send a bouquet of roses to chinjiagong's work place the next day.

couldn't take it any longer at the disturbing stereos, sibeikang turned and shouted back at his menacing wifey.

"Can u shut the fuckup! i am talking to someone else not my teetujia!" he yelled at her. that din shut her up. in fact it made the stereos even louder and more intense.

"FUCK THE HELL URSELF! U ASSHOLE!" retaliated the wife.

without further words, sibeikang said to the receiver, "SORRY, I THINK I CANCEL ORDER...SORRY...." and hang up.

next he passed his mobile to his wife and asked her to scroll through who he was just talking too.

well, sibeikang wasn't lying. but wife wasn't going to apologise either...and then.......leetahsar's phone rang. MY GOD! 2 am in the morning...and here i go...."WHO THE FUCK IS THIS!!!?"....."Tahsar....sorry to call u so late....can u come out for a moment...i come fetch u now....."........

and that ladies and gents was my "panda" sleep poor sibeikang gave me as VALENTINE'S DAY present. one cute fat panda me with darkened ringed eyes on VALENTINE'S DAY.....:9(

.....to be cont'd ...coming soon to ur nearest pc......

valentine's night....where romances suppose to start...WRONG AGAIN!

ringggg....! my phone rang. and i just got back from the public pool. sorry no luck today. nothing to pick :(. and hell was i hungry after my laps of non stop swim.

goodie! sibeikang coming to pick me up for dinner. of course, it would be on him. dun forget he still otang (owes) me $40 from the supposedly "go dutch" timsum weeks ago.

and REVENGE TIME....wahahaha!....;9)

p ...ppp..p..pp! that would be him downstair. off i ran in my shorts and tees and slipper.

omg! another new mini austin. so cute this one! pearly pink with white top. and OMG! i tot he was going to pour all his weepy troubles on my shoulder and what's chinjiagong doing on the front seat. shit! means i got to squeeze my fat arse awkardly into the back. it was rather claustrophic. i felt like an oversize plump sardine squeeze into a tin can. :(

i beckoned to sibeikang. using my telepathic powers, i was sensing...FIREPOWER....6....AWKARDNESS.....10+....KAYPOHNES....exploding pretty soon....

but seriously i sensed tonnes of anger within chinjiagong...and tonnes of unexplained melancholic sadness and disappointment in sibeikang...like he was thinking...i should ve married teetujia and tonight i wouldn't have to spend a dime on the yao kwee(greedy piggy) leetahsar...shit! there goes another costly lobster for the piggy sar....hahahaha....

and yao kwee piggy was exactly what i was....if not then how...me damn hungry now u know after the vigorous swim. so this piggy ate with no bound held...but dun think shrewd sibeikang was throwing another lobster to feed this piggy.

he only threw a bowl of cheapskate congee. and worst, that cheapskate place was recommended by me....TENG CHAI CHOK (congee) only cost $2 with all the charpalangs thrown in. got fish slices, pork, fishcake, peanuts, cuttlefish, fishmaw...etc..etc..

FOODIE NOTE: TENG CHAI CHOK - An unique chok or congee originated from HK. it's suppose to be a staple snack for those bumboat rowers who venture to sea to fish. and whatever things they caught in their nets, they throw them into a big pot of bubbling congee...and hence the name TENG CHAI CHOK....teng chai in cantonese means little bumboat.

after the modest humble meal, sibeikang recommended to go for jalan jalan (walking) in chinatown. me...of course i had no opinion. if i were to be home, most likely posting bo liao threads and bored more forummers crazy pulling out their hairs by the roots....now u know why many guys are getting bald here....courtesy from reading and being tortured mentally by leetahsar's bo liao postings...hahahaha....

and walk and jalan we did. 3 goons like 3 stooges so freaking quiet. not a word from sibeikang. very weird. this is not the chatty jovial sibeikang i knew....it was like sibeikang's grandfather walking beside me whom i never knew....hahahaha...

soon we went into a mall. went up an escalator...and this place brought back beautiful memories for me. it used to be a pinballs arcade. too bad i killed all the pinballs and so the arcade folded up eventually...i mean how not bankrupt if i could play whole day with just maybe $2 token. and when they about to close, i still got plenty of credits games inside the machine....pai seh...that was how good i was then.

and now this place was converted into a KTV...karaoke. there my goodness! my bunch of newly adopted godchildren all down there waiting...er...for me??? on valentine's day??? wow lau! so sweet! felt like kissing everyone of them...:)

they had booked a big room and the whole bunch went in.

i din realise how degraded our karaoke had become. in the past there were dress codes to adhere to before entering. now anything u wear or didn't wear also ok and could be admitted.

imagined this chiopek in slippers, shorts and round ts just walked in yayapapaya and belted his lungs out...

sad is the kind of business now degraded into such a shameless state....and what did our paps gov brat?...the economy was improving...and better than expected...my ass!

so for the night, it was my night..and MY WAY.....one of the powered song i blasted till i think i cracked up the speakers.

and they encored me. ok lor! i continued with chinese medleys like su rui HOLD HANDS....and for my finale song...DANNY BOY and SOMETIMES WHEN WE TOUCH...

*applause...clap..clap..clap*

and in the corner of my eye, i noticed sibeikang was sulking expressionlessly while chinjiagong kept hogging the mike and screeched her chicken slaughtering mercies...no wonder the aircond felt so much colder....
it was 2 am in the morning. karaoke closing and the whole gang dispersed. so pai seh, they footed for my share in the bill. they said i deserved it cos i really entertained them with my powered songs.....pai seh.

sibeikang sent me back in his pinky mini.

wah lau! deadbeat and deadmeat man! almost 2.30am. was reading the newspaper briefly and shit! no! the phone rang.......

"hello, tahsar is it?" whispered a voice. it was sibeikang. "wow! u were great huh! like a damn quiet dog, u sat at one corner. but when u hit it....u really hit it man!...."

"aye...beikang...me wanna sleep oredi u know?" i replied sheepishly...."there's nothing wrong with u and chinjiagong what? how come u said both of u were clashing?"

"tahsar....i very thong khor (suffering)! bo bian! infront of those jokers must act macho and pretend loving....so far u r the only person who knows what's happening, u know...."

"simi meh? real or not?" i teased him devilishly.

"k...talk to u again, she's out of the toilet now...call u again tomorrow." hurriedly the phone was hung up.....
it was 2 am in the morning. karaoke closing and the whole gang dispersed. so pai seh, they footed for my share in the bill. they said i deserved it cos i really entertained them with my powered songs.....pai seh.

sibeikang sent me back in his pinky mini.

wah lau! deadbeat and deadmeat man! almost 2.30am. was reading the newspaper briefly and shit! no! the phone rang.......

"hello, tahsar is it?" whispered a voice. it was sibeikang. "wow! u were great huh! like a damn quiet dog, u sat at one corner. but when u hit it....u really hit it man!...."

"aye...beikang...me wanna sleep oredi u know?" i replied sheepishly...."there's nothing wrong with u and chinjiagong what? how come u said both of u were clashing?"

"tahsar....i very thong khor (suffering)! bo bian! infront of those jokers must act macho and pretend loving....so far u r the only person who knows what's happening, u know...."

"simi meh? real or not?" i teased him devilishly.

"k...talk to u again, she's out of the toilet now...call u again tomorrow." hurriedly the phone was hung up.....
next day, all were quiet. me happily posting bo liao threads again...about my undies picking which now progressed into swim trunks and goggles...hahahaha...just picked another branded one TYR.

then the phone rang....."tahsar, din go out..still writing ur bo liao posts is it?" sibeikang as usual. "how? yesterday peaceful right? u sent ur rose bouquet to wifey?" i asked.

"aiyah! tarsah, after she stereo me when i was talking to the florist, the feeling of giving her the flowers was dead man..." sbk explained dejectedly. "the bloody florist said cannot cancel order so in the end u know where i sent it to?"

"er...teetujia?"

"eh...how cum u know huh?"

"sibeikang, u r damn F stupid!! wtf in the world u sent the flowers to teetujia? ur backside is really itchy right?" i scolded incessantly.

"then how...i paid for the flowers with my card already, u know....not cheap leh...hundred plus ...and teetu after getting the flowers was so happy cos it was co-incidentally her birthday too...."

"u huh...damn damn stupid and asking for it from wifey again if she finds out. she's sure going to give u 18th floors of HELL!" i warned him. "u give the flowers to anyone lah...ur mum, ur auntie...or me also can....what the hell were u thinking....giving it to teetujia...the source of all ur misunderstanding?"

"aiyah, sar ...u free tonight or not?" he finally asked.

"sure...me retired what...free every night, afternoon and morning...why?"

"wanna to makan?...i belanja u..."

"free one...sure why not...u call me lor..." end of conversation...i was sniggering away. tarsah, tarsah....u greedy piggy...free food only...everything also can...but then again now i AM their official marriage counsellor what....let see...shall i order the lobster thermidor...or may i be greedier...i order the turf and surf, i.e lobster plus carpet beef...u know the one where they stuffed juicy oysters in between thick piece of mouth watering beef steak...heeheehee...;9)

MY WEIRD FT IT TENANT.....

this joker is very weird. after u read my story, pls help me to analyse what is he doing now...and could he maybe be a part time midnight cowboy?

he had changed to a new job in a public listed company barely 3 mths. suddenly, he was so relaxed and most of the time at home.

in the past 3 mths, he was always in a frenzy rush.....woke up at about 6am....and by 7 am, he was off to work in a heave.

now so so relaxed. slept so late and like taking things damn easy. when asked, he told me he was promoted and now company allocated him to do a programming project.

out of curiousty, one day while he was out, i checked his room. on his table, there was a letter from the IT school he was part timing.

it was the results slip from the exam he just took weeks ago....

COMPUTER PROGRAMMING - FAILED

MATHEMATICS -FAILED.......

as u can see, he failed in the main subject of his IT...computer programming.

then came past midnight when the clock struck 12, he was active again. he spent the entire day sleeping....and now when everyone about to sleep, he woke up. dressed in long sleeves stylo milo smart pants. sprayed himself with damn powderful perfumed dunno what cologne. took his laptop and a little briefcase and off he charbok only to be back like maybe 7 or 8 am the next morning...

strange, i was telling myself...what the hell is this young punk doing....CAN HE BE A MIDNIGHT COWBOY?

then a few days before cny, he told me company sent him to JB to do another project....and off he went. then eve of cny that was already 3 days he had left, he sms me telling me he would only be back until 11 Feb which was only 2 days ago. and yes he came back. the moment i saw him, i handshook him and greeted him HAPPY NEW YEAR....and he auto passed me the rental for this month. already like 11 days behind schedule.

yesterday being sunday, he was off again. this time to his nearby block where his sister, now a PR was staying with hubby and a newborn.

again kaypoh me asked him, what's he doing at the sis' place. he told me chitchatting cos long time no see her....

and then today, he told me he was staying put at sis' place as sis and hubby flew off to BALI for 3 days holidays. he gotta babysit the newborn....

my god! ain't this little young bugger fishy???

now with ur sherlock holmes deduction, what can he be up to?

for starter, i think he already got the boots from the company....and the late nights outing...can he be working as a midnight cowboy? a gigolo? a quack quack duckling???

tell me pls...i better start planning just in case.....

HORROR FINDS AT THE SWIMMING POOL TODAY

JUST Got back from the pool. i was merrily swimming away, then alamak, i farted. must be the remnants of yesterday temple's humongous veggie yusheng....bloob...bloob...bloob...big bubbles of farts surfacing out of the pool.

off i headed to the toilet which was also the changing and shower room....

when i proceeded to the cubicle to do my big business, i saw a towel covering...goodness, another branded undies, B.U.M.S. but my tummy couldn't stand any longer and hastily i went into the nearest cubicle and ermmmh...ermmmh...peeleepalah...peeleepalalah....everything discharged out...haizzzz!! what a relief! anyway i had done my laps already so exited the cubicle i headed for the shower cubicle next.

again i saw the towel covering the BUMS undies. out of curiousity, i approached and lifted the towel since i was the only joker in the big changing/shower toilet.

OH MY GOD!! shits stain undies.....*YUCKS*!!......i gotta a feeling must be some cheeky jokers from this forum who purposely left it there to wickedly entice me....the undies goon...:(

choy! damn suay! better shower quickly and buzz off.......but then at another far end bench, oh my goodness! a TYR black swimming shorts trunk...hmm....not bad L size......my size. good! it was clean and dry.....so i supped....i think i will give this to one of the indian FTs workers of my indian chief....:)

MTHLY EXPENDITURES OF LTS: (x 2 = 2 units pigeonholes)

tv license (giro n instalment) x 2........................$18

2 house phone......................................................20

phones subscription every 3 mths...........................50

handphone...no use by can't terminate....................21

broadband 45

PUB x 2 ...........................................................180

transport .....................60

swimming & locker..................................................20

grocery (seng ka liao) ...........................................200

4d n toto .....................................100

(but always kena this mth alone about 4k +)

property taxes x 2 instalment giro..............................20

miscellaneous....donations and charpalang..................50

TOTAL: $784

COMMISSION FROM INDIAN CHIEF: 500

EVERY MTH SHORTFALL: $284....

this mth blessing from heaven $4556

still got balance: $4727

dunno how and where kena lst prize $15000

last mth keep kena 4d...dunno how much.. 1000+

account balance: $20272

so safe for this year...and got spare to go long long

holidays. mostly likely to taiwan....can tahan if for at least 2yrs.....:9)

SHIT, PEE AND EVERYTHING FREE...
was in recluse in my toilet for almost an hour and ermmmh..and ermmmmmmh...and...peeleepalah....all eventually came out!

phui! what a relieve!.....must have eaten too much from yesterday temple buffet veggie meal....after makan ta pow home some more....no lah! they insisted i packet back....they did it for me giving me an EXTRA large veggie yusheng.....so the whole night with mamalee and my just returned IT FT tenant, we supped and supped....goodness! the veggie yusheng was humongous....better dun eat too much next time there....i think i ve given those temple lau aunties that i am really a PIGGY impression....hahahaha....;9). no wonder they are also giving me big big serving of food...and i pai seh to waste it....even though i can't swallow anymore...i will force all the food in. bad to waste temple food, what....

and this morning....so good...so refreshing .....ALL THE DAMN STINKING SHIT ALL EXPELLED....and here i am giving u the SHIT OF MY LIFE STORY....hahahha....;9)

wow!....the whole body never feels so much lighter....shiok!!

now ur shit story and question before i continue further.....:) into pee........and everything FREE.....;9)

hello...why all so shy n quiet? quick leh...if not i gotta to poo again....

and now for the PEE....

U know yusheng primarily is made up of all the roots veggies like carrot, raddish, turnip, seasoned ginger dyed in red, pickled mango, pomelo pulps, pickled young papayas, crushed peanuts, sesame seeds, fried crispy wanton skin, kumquat juice, lemon juice, preserved sweetened tong qua(winter melon).....what else? did i left out any vital ingredients....

oh ya shit! the yusheng or raw fish in tradition lou hei...but here in the temple we use a special kind of agar agar that has the texture of sliced fish....very QQ...very shioker than the real raw fish....and u won't get food poisoning or worms from ingesting it. riskier to eat the raw fish especially those that dunno caught from where one....easily contaminated and may harbor parasitic worms eggs that created havoc in ur digestive system once ingested.....that's why they said the japs are full of shit! due to the worms they consumed from the raw sushi or fishes or seafood...now u know why hor....:9)

back to our veggie. due to the usuage of raddish, u will be surpised when u PEE....cos the PEE is extra stinky! dun worry, it's the miracle works of the ingested raddish....

raddish suppose to clear and clean our system of toxins....they said if u got poison in ur blood, drink a cup of raddish *yuck, horrible like fuck!* juice....and ur poison will be neutralised...and if u take any medicine, avoid raddish - like chai tao kuey or fried raddish cake - cos it also neutralises the effect of the medicine u r taking.

so ur extra stinky pee is actually a riddance of toxicity built up in ur body...

and how many of u come to my temple yesterday?...din come, ur losses hor....don't say i din tell u hor...i did invite everyone of u...so how many responded?
\alamak...still no response!...me out of the toilet recluse the 2nd time...and all still so quiet...:(

u mean everyone having a good monday time is it...if that's the case....then i better close shop for today and go swimming....BO SENG LI!

i ve done with SHIT, PEE...and now for the EVERYTHING FREE.....:)

if u read until here...u already got everything free....if u came to my temple yesterday, well...u got free veggie food and free lou hei yusheng...

and if u read until here....i ve given u free recipe to next year yusheng meal...dun eat out, damn freaking expensive...can u imagine a bloody plate of cheapskate roots veggies and a few pieces of decaying raw fishes slices can cost like $60...the bloody avarice restauranters on this cny day brandished their bloodied parangs very sharp, u know....:(...u go makan...u kena chop chop until heads drop...hahaha....;(

so here's the free recipe for u...and the free benefit for eating veggie yusheng....u siam the parasitic worms eggs in the raw fish....

SO EAT GOOD, PLAY SAFE AND BE GENTLE TO YOUR BODY...

thank u...guess gotta end this bo liao thread...BO SENG LI...no response...SHIT!