MY TING TONG BROTHER CARROT LEE...cont'd

so for the days to follow, it was like fish and water for the pair. mud and water....shit and urine!!! for soon kum ee mee's time had come for her to return to miri, her notorious hometown. for the past few months, carrot had to send her to the causeway to stamp her passport so that she could stay for another 2 weeks....but repeating too many times would surely alert the immigration. that was why kum ee mee gotta really go home this time. it was a teary event....no not for the papaya girl. rather it was the lovelorn carrot. and so kum see mee gone home leaving the dejected lovesick carrot all alone......
then like heaven arranged them to meet long long again. my old man got a client from sarawak and learnt of carrot's back plight. he suggested carrot went back with him to sarawak. he knew a aborigine witchdoctor who could cure this symptom once and for all.
carrot was thrilled not about curing his back rather it was like a godsend for him to be able to see kum see mee as coincidentally that client's hometown was also miri....so without hesistating, carrot agreed to return home with the sarawakian client. he was a really good man and treated carrot to more drinking and havocing...and well the nonsense any man would want to have. he paid and entertained carrot and also brought him to the ??? witchdoctor to have his back healed.
carrot after settling his back problem, bought alot of primitive herbs to bring back to brew. he then proceeded to look for kum see mee who stayed in a very ulu village where u had to walk like a few bus stops before u actually reached the kampong's entrance.....
u know what...a spider spirit is not known to be a spider spirit for nothing hor...this goondu san kong kong or 3 0 0 - means a real stupid fool carrot booked a luxurious hotel room, rented mercedes and ferried kum ee mee around and of course, she stayed and accompanied him throughout.
soon carrot had to be gotten back home. so the love birds parted. and carrot came home with bags and bags of primitive herbs and a list of other herbs that could be bought locally.
now the expenditure bills....$8k for the berbs and treatment; $12k for the rumping with kum ee mee. of course the stingy stinky old man of ours hit the roofs and grumbled and complained to mama lee. carrot overhead the whole conversation and hit even higher roof, if there was one. quarrels with the old man ensue.
in his fit of anger, carrot went to the kitchen and came out with a threatening chopper. me and mum panicked. i quickly rushed to grab hold of his hand which is menacingly coming towards the humiliating old man who kept blabbering insulting degrading remarks at carrot...
wow-wee! that drama, i would remember till the day i died.....very scary and that freaking old shit nearly had his day...in the end, carrot left the house with teary eyes......and the whole episode thus ended in sorrow for me and mum.....then days passed. the squabblings with old man was like a daily activity and pastime....sometime over during dinner...and the dinner went to waste. everyone lost their appetite. result: a crying sad mama lee. and days turned to months...then to years. then 4yrs later, carrot's phone suddenly rang. oh no!! the miri spider spirit was back. worst, she was back with a little spider male spirit....a 4 yrs old boy. a cute little boy. an autustic boy....my god! carrot, carrot what had u been doing while in miri? jacking and humping merrily ur nights away is it?!!!...and out of the blue, i was now an uncle to the (?) autustic boy....
what to do? carrot was thrillled. he was a father. he was a dad to a 4 yrs old (?) autustic boy. kum ee mee was back this time to marry carrot...as though she was for real. i mean a even bigger papaya woman with a boy...was as good as a scrapped vehicle that cannot obtained C O E any more, right? so u can't land big, u land smaller one like my stupid goon carrot brother.
yes, carrot was thrilled to the bone. spider spirit mum also here. the moment she landed, carrot took off from work and used the company's car to ferry her whole tribe to shopping. he really splurged on this kum ee mee. got a gold bangles, soviet titus watches ...pair some more one for her and one for himself. bought clothing for his (?) son and also gold jewelery for the spider mum. the same night, booked 10 course dinner where my tribe met the spider spirit's tribe comprising of her mum, her 2 sisters and of course (?) son.... it was sumptuous dinner. mum's birthday one also lost to this which cost about 1k....
so it was the duel or bargaining of dowries between the 2 mums. after the dinner, old man drove mum and sisters back. me went with carrot, his papaya "wife" and sisters to belt it out in karaoke. of course, carrot footing the bills, lah. who else? me ha....sorry leh i only $300/mth not even enough for the X dinner we just have.
after the night's wet out, everything was back to usual the next day. kum ee mee went marketing for grocery. hell, she really spent money like washing her hands with water. it was like no body's busines. her mum and sisters returned home the next day, while she and autustic son stayed put. so only 3 persons in carrot's rented flat and her marketing hit more than $100. the whole damn fridge was stuffed to the brink.
the same night, carrot brought his wife and (?) son to eat at my house. that was when i observed and noticed my "nephew" was autustic. he would scream when the tv was on especially some singing was on. he would scream again when there was applause....god! i got a screaming heller here. the sharp loud screams were driving me nuts! i thought of give him a few tight slaps to shut the fuck out of him!
it was another torturous night. after carrot left with family, mum was really disappointed and consulted me, "Tahsar, u think that's my grandson or not hah?"....i really dunno how to reply. obviously not. it didn't in anyway resembled my carrot brother....and hell what an autustic screamer!
finally, i just couldn't stand it any longer, "Mum, do u know who kum ee mee wrote in the birth cert as the father to the boy?" mum was shocked with eyes opened wide, "Eh, who?" "Her brother-in-law, that's who. how come she dun put carrot's name as the official father, leh? very mysterious who's the real father of this autustic boy....4yrs ago, now then she brought him back to show us. funny isn't it?" i gave mum lots of question marks that her gape never opened any wider before....."Mum, can u tell carrot to bring the kid for DNA testing to be sure he is his son? dun said i teach u hor, he comes after me with chopper, ok this ting tong brother!" i told my mum what to do.

...."and mum, i got to tell u this....this ting tong's posb all dried up...no money...kosong...," i revealed to mum whose eyes and mouth were getting bigger by the moment. " and just now after dinner, stupid dupid carrot wants to borrow from me 10k to give to kum ee mee...i was wondering for what...but he din want to say..."
"what, u mean the hu lei cheng(foxy spirit) asks ur brother to ask from u so much money?!!" mum finally said something. "dun give him!! tomorrow i got to his flat with ur 2nd sis...and check out this hu lei cheng...cannot understand the ting tong son of my. when he was in sarawak suppose to treat his back, he spent so much on her...now brought her here....and spend all his saving...obviously it's a money loving hu lei cheng...how can i ve her as a daughter in law...?"
it was a very complicated thing here. u see, in order to get this spider spirit to become a PR here, she had to have either money or paper qualification. how was she qualify? a bar hostess or a spider spirit? so a bit more tedious for carrot. in order to get her that pr, he went to engage a lawyer who assured him can be done but pay $8k which the stupid goon carrot already paid 5k, balance 3k suppose to borrow from me to settle the bill....
the next day, mum and sis were there at her place. mum was very clever. pretended to bring century egg pork congee for her so could start her own investigation.
an innocent spider spirit kum ee mee opened the door and let mum and sis in. there after the casual chit chat came the real questioning. mum told kum ee mee, "kum ee mee, my carrot is a very poor and broke guy...u know his bank account is totally depleted the moment u came....now he had to pressurise his kindly brother tahsar to lend him 10k to help get u the pr status....do u love my carrot or love his money?" that was a direct shot to the bone question blurted by mum.....kum ee mee was caught unprepared...she remained silent. head bowed and dare not look at mum...the situation was getting awkard but finally it ended with mum telling her, "If u love carrot for his character, i welcome u as my good daughter-in-law...but if u love him for his money...sorry he's now poorer than a beggar!" with that she left kum ee mee gape ajar....
the next day, carrot called my mum and told her that kum ee mee was returning to miri. she got urgent matter to attend to at home....(lame reason)...he was sending her to the airport. he asked my mum to go clear his whole fridge full of groceries. if not they would go to waste.
and that was the last i seen or heard of kum ee mee and my (?) autustic nephew.
carrot is now finally officially married to another ipoh girl whom we initially thought was a good woman.....yes a good and very instigating woman who always chor chor here and chor chor there and made my 3 sisters quarreled like anything....in the end, i exposed her misdeed and now everyone in the family treats her coldly...and the ting tong carrot is still as blur as what a devious wife he got.
the worst part, this ipoh girl is barren. married 10 yrs to my goon brother and not a single egg she bears. and worst worst still, she goes tell everyone my carrot got no bullets to fertilise her....we only found out the fault was with her instead of carrot.
both she and carrot went for the artificial insemination process. at first everyone was thrilled and thought we going to have triplets. in the end, it was a stillbirth, ie, the triplets were already dead inside the ovary before they could develop further. the doctor told us that the wife was quite barren with weak ovary which cannot hold on to a developing foetus and advise us to adopt instead of trying again....that expose her real nature....and now the whole family dislike her...i never dislike anyone before but this woman is truly a wicked one in her most devious standard.
put the husband, my brother in bad light when actually the faults lies in her. my sisters used to stuff money into her...but not anymore cos the money we gave she sent it back to her mum. now her mum is like a wong ah mah living in a real big landed property. we still in cope up pigeonholes.
with this, ends my story about my ting tong carrot brother. 15 yrs later, if my ting tong brother can prospers, u bet the miri spider spirit would definitely be back to claim a piece of his wealth. i will then get to see my autustic (?) nephew. how he turns out to be...but i do pray for the kid...he's an innocent victim in this messed up domestic drama......
the end..or to be continued...15yrs later for the finale....